Page 8 of The Sun
I nodded in a bit of a daze. I couldn’t believe I had just punched Jenny Smith. I was going to be in so much trouble.
“What’d she do?” he asked.
I shrugged. I wouldn’t dare tell him. Then Daisy opened her big, fat mouth, “Jenny was saying bad things about you, and Sunny punched her.”
A crooked smile shaped Elias’ lips. “I’ve never seen a girl punch someone before.”
“I never wanted to punch anybody before.”
“Did you like it?” he asked.
“No.”
The grin on Elias’ face was the biggest I’d ever seen. “Well, I liked it. Almost as much as I like you.”
3
Elias
October 1991
At that point, it had been over two years since Miss Watson—the social work that carted me from foster home to foster home—brought me to the state department to meet Mr. Lower.
Before she opened the door to the building, she bent over, her round glasses nearly slipping off her nose, and she told me that someone in my family would eventually come for me. She grinned when she made that statement and then patted the top of my head as though that thought should make me feel good or something. I guess some kids wanted a family member to take them, but I only had my Aunt Billie. Paw always said she was a lot-lizard. I didn’t know what that was, but even at age nine, it didn’t sound good.
Twenty-four months and there had been no sign of the lot-lizard. That should have made me happy, I guess, seeing as how I really liked living in the Lower’s nice house. It had two stories with one of those wrap around porches and a swing just like I’d see on television shows. Mrs. Lower baked cookies constantly, and always smiled sweetly, except for the time I got sent to the principal’s office for yanking Jenny’s hair. I tried to tell Mrs. Lower Jenny had it coming, but she wouldn’t listen. I bet if she’d let me explain that freckled-face Jenny Smith whispered to Daisy Fulmer that Sunny’s dress was ugly, she would have given me a cookie.
But even with the nice house and all the smiles and cookies—even with Sunny Ray as my forever best friend, I couldn’t be too happy. Every day when I thought about what happened before Mrs. Watson showed up to take my brothers and me away, my stomach twisted like a wad of snakes around a struggling rat. Sunny wouldn’t want nothing to do with me if she knew my paw was bad. That was for sure. So I didn’t let myself get too happy or too settled. I felt awful that I’d lied to Sunny, telling her I’d never leave her. I knew one day I would—I’d have to, because she’d want me to. But boy, I hoped that didn’t come for a long time.
That’s why I tried not to think about that night my paw shot those two men and shoved them in our trunk, and most of the time, I didn’t. I was too busy thinking about Sunny and her pretty smile that made me all warm inside. Something about her heated me from the center like I’d just eaten a bowl of soup. But at night, when Mr. and Mrs. Lower were in their room, watching TV, and I was alone in my bed with that dumb He-Man nightlight glowing in the corner, I couldn’t help but think about it.
I’d close my eyes, and there it was. A black stain behind my eyelids. By the time the low hum from the Lower’s television cut off, my heart usually pounded in my chest like an Indian war drum.
That night, the TV didn’t cut off, and I was lost in the memory of how the smell of cigarettes and bourbon made my pulse race and the back of my neck sweat. I needed the scent of candy to help me feel safe.
When the clock on my nightstand blinked over to eleven thirty, I crawled out of bed and tiptoed to my door. The blue flicker of light from the Lower’s TV danced on their bedroom wall. From my doorway, I could see Mr. Lower on his back, one arm dangling off the mattress. Even though I figured he was asleep, I counted to one-hundred before I snuck down the hall and slipped into Sunny’s room.
The second the floorboards creaked under my foot, she sat up. “What took you so long?” she whispered.
“Your dad fell asleep with the TV on.” I hopped onto the bed next to Sunny, bouncing her a few times. It sent her into a giggling fit. Her laughs made me happy.
When I finally settled underneath her sheets, I inhaled that smell of candy that was all Sunny deep into my lungs until she felt like a part of me. I wanted Sunny Ray to always be a part of me because no one else ever had.
She snuggled right into her fluffy pillow, her blond hair spilling over onto my arm. And then we started our nightly game of Have You Ever. We’d ask each other questions until one of us fell asleep.
“Have you ever been to Disney World?” she started.
“No.”
“Me neither.” She sighed. “Maybe when we grow up we can go.”
“Yeah. Maybe.” I shifted, fighting with the sheets tangled around my feet. “Have you ever eaten an ant?”
“Eww. No. Have you?”
“Nah. I don’t like the thought of their six little legs in my mouth.” I wiggled my fingers in front of her face. Pretending they were the prickly legs of an insect and she laughed.
We kept going until Sunny’s voice drifted, and I knew she was nearly asleep. I rolled over, placing my face in her hair. That night, for the first time, when I closed my eyes next to Sunny, that black stain on my soul lingered on my lids, and I smelled the cigarettes creeping around me. My eyes popped open, and I gripped the sheets, staring at the doorway.
