Page 54 of Date with Destiny

I groan with guilt and Myfanwy leans over, reading the messages over my shoulder.

‘For god’s sake!’ she huffs. But I feel genuinely terrible. I quickly type out a reply, telling her I’m safe and that I’m sosososososo sorry.

‘You’re a grown woman in your thirties!’ Myfanwy says. ‘You’ve been over here many times without having to check in with her!’

‘But she probably stayed up all night waiting to hear from me!’ I cry, horror-struck.

I watch as the blue tick instantly appears by my message to Celeste. My stomach flips as she comesonlineand my heart thumps as the dot-dot-dots start and stop several times.

‘She made the choice to wait up for you,’ Myfanwy points out. ‘You didn’t ask her to do that, did you? You’re both adults and she’s making a choice to obsess over your whereabouts. It’s her trying to control you –again!You have to talk to her about this.’

‘Oh god, Ican’t,’ I wail. ‘I know I’m pathetic, but she’s so hard to talk to about things like this. She gets so angry and emotional.’

Myfanwy sighs. ‘And she’s allowed to have emotions and feel how she feels. But she’s not allowed to pile all those emotions on you and use them as a way to bend you to her will. When she can’t control you by literally telling you what to do, she tries to control you with her emotions.’

‘I really don’t think it’s as cynical as all that,’ I try weakly. ‘I don’t think she does any of it deliberately. She’s just been ten times worse since Aunt Diane died. I think Diane was quite a grounding presence for her. And then with me moving in and being such a wreck, it’s a weird time for her.’

Celeste’s reply comes at last and it is as damning as I knew it would be.

A single, yellow thumbs-up.

The guilt in my stomach curdles into pure terror. Celeste is next-level furious and I am going to get it so hard when I get back there. I sink further into the bed, pulling the covers up around my ears.

Myfanwy switches on the TV and locates the latest episode ofMarried at First Sight.

We watch in silence while I pulse with dread.

I feel Myfanwy still beside me. She’s preparing to speak. ‘I wanted to get your advice on something,’ she begins at last. I look up, waiting for her to continue. ‘It’s just…’ She seems nervous all of a sudden. ‘It’s… I, well…’ She clears her throat. ‘I wanted to tell you, I’m going to propose to Sonali.’

‘OH MY GOD!’ I shout joyfully before I can stop myself, leaping up into a seated position before remembering Sonali is in the flat somewhere.

Myfanwy laughs, delightedly. ‘I was worried you might be upset, after everything you’ve been through,’ she begins and I burst into tears. She looks crestfallen.

‘I swear I’m not crying because I’m upset!’ I say through snot. ‘This is all happiness, I swear to you!’ I wipe at my eyes. ‘This is just thebestnews. You two are so wonderful and kind to each other. Thank you for telling me.’

She breathes out, relief flooding her face. ‘You’re sure?’

I nod, pulling her back in for another hug. ‘Really, really.’ I pull away, drying my eyes. ‘So what are you going to do? How are you going to do it? What’s the plan?’

This is exactly what I need. A dose of my best friend’s happiness. Seeing her so delirious with Sonali makes the world a better place. Nothing could take away from that; not even me getting left at the altar.

She throws herself back into the pillows. ‘Argh! This is the difficult bit…’ She looks up at me. ‘And I was hoping you could help me with it. Could we talk through some ideas? You’re so brilliant at this kind of thing, you’ll help me come up with the perfect thing.’

Her compliments fill me with some indescribable emotion. It’s thenicestfeeling because I do actually feel like I can help her with this. I know I’m good at this! It’s the best, loveliest thing, knowing I really can be of use with all this.

‘Ooh, and you have to help me with a ring!’ she says excitedly, as I nod, thrilled.

‘Of course! You could work with Zach on something bespoke if you like? He’s a genius.’

She wiggles her eyebrows at me. ‘Ooh, Zach’s a genius is he?’

‘Shut up,’ I laugh, swatting at her. ‘Do you have a ring in mind already?’

Her shoulders lift. ‘Well,’ she begins, sitting back up and repositioning herself so she is cross-legged and facing me. ‘Did you know Victoria Beckham apparently has, like, fifteen engagement rings?’

I raise my eyebrows. ‘I didn’t know that, but go ahead. Are we planning to outdo a former Spice Girl?’

Myfanwy smiles, ‘Always! That’s how I live my life. But it was more that I was thinking I might give Sonali several engagement rings. Maybe not fifteen! Maybe ten. One for each finger. Each one would represent the special moments throughout our relationship. Like, see, I could get a turquoise ring to signify our first holiday together, when we swam in this amazing blue water and I realized I loved her.’

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