Page 8 of Date with Destiny

‘Toni! My darling!’ she calls out now, releasing me from her grip. Across the room, my sister smiles tightly, ‘I’m just with a client!’ she says smoothly, gesturing at Sleazo, who is fully ignoring her now to stare at the vision of Celeste before him.

Celeste pouts. ‘Toni is so unaffectionate, isn’t she, Ginny?’

I murmur a vague dissent but my mother is already off on one.

‘She’s never going to get Shawn to marry her if she continues like that,’ she declares, at a volume that Toni can clearly hear. ‘She’s so beautiful, but it’s not enough, is it, darling? She needs to be an appealing prospect to a man or she’ll end up alone and lonely, won’t she?’ Her questions rarely require an answer. Her viewers play drinking games duringEngage!, taking a shot every time Celeste Bretherton asks a question and then answers it herself.

It’s a shame I’ve not been invited to contribute to our conversation because actually I’d like to point out that Toni is one of the warmest, most open and affectionate people in my life, and Shawn doesn’t deserve to be near her, never mind marry her; I really don’t like her boyfriend choice. He’s much older than her – more like my age – and has an arrogance I can’t stand. He’s always showing off and one-upping everyone in the room. Toni can do a thousand times better,but it’s not my place to tell her that. She’s only twenty-three; she has to figure out about dickheads on her own.

Toni and I weren’t that close growing up, what with the nine-year age gap, but it’s been the nicest thing ever, working with her at the store and getting to know her as an adult these last few years.

Celeste is still talking to me, slash herself. ‘No hugs for her mummy, and meanwhiles Daddy’s abandoned me again.’ She pouts. ‘He’s back in Canada for another scouting trip.’

It cringes me out so hard that she says Mummy and Daddy. As of 6.02am today, I’m thirty-two! PlusDaddysort of implies a very hands-on, papa bear-type figure. Whereas my dad is actually quite a sweet but distant,barely aroundpresence. He does the stone sourcing for our business, and is constantly in faraway places on lengthy research and purchase trips. We’ve made such a big thing in the press about being conflict-free and ethical about our jewellery practices, so Mum and Dad decided many years ago that he had to be totally involved in that side of things. We can’t afford to let a blood diamond through the net.

He’s currently in Canada, which compared to his other regular destination – Australia – is just around the corner.

‘Has Daniel got something nice planned tonight for your birthday?’ Celeste regards me seriously and it takes a moment to realize this is one question I’m actually meant to answer.

I smile shyly. ‘Oh, I don’t know – I don’t think so. To be honest, I think we’ll keep things low key. It’s not a specialbirthday and we do have kind of a big party coming up…’ I give a short laugh.

‘Don’t you dare call the wedding of the century aparty!’ Celeste looks horrified and I try not to flinch atwedding of the century.

‘Well, anyway,’ I shake off the fear, ‘he’s probably too distracted getting excited for his stag do this weekend to worry about birthday stuff. He’s already started packing!’ I laugh at his enthusiasm, remembering how I tripped over a large suitcase and two rucksacks in the hallway this morning. Daniel and his friends are only going for three days, but the man has packed enough for a month. He’s always been more high maintenance than me; his stuff takes up 90 per cent of our bathroom cabinets.

‘Oh darling, well, let me take you out for the evening then!’ Celeste cries excitedly and I panic-backtrack.

‘Um, right! Er, that’s so nice of you, Mum, but actually, now that I think about it, Danieldidtell me to keep the evening free, so maybe we’re going out for dinner or something?’ I lie unconvincingly, catching Toni’s eye a few feet away.

‘Hmm, OK,’ she replies with more than a hint of sulk to her voice. ‘As long as he’s making aproperfuss of you. You’re so special and beautiful, you deserve to be celebrated at every opportunity.’

This is the thing about my mum. She’s controlling and annoying but I’ve never been in any doubt about how much she loves me. The need, like,pulsesout of her in thiscloying, aggressive way, spurting in every direction. It’s part of why I struggle to tell her to back off, because I know it’s mostly coming from a place of love. Dysfunctional, aggressive love, but still love. I think it’s also this misguided idea she has that Toni and I are an extension of her. She assumes that everything she would want must be what I would also want. So of course I’d want an over-the-top hen do with fifty people I’ve never met, collectively doing an array of insane, boring or dangerous activities. And of course I’d want a wedding with 300 virtual strangers watching me walk down the aisle in a venue with 2,000-foot ceilings. And of course I’d want a birthday extravaganza on a random Wednesday evening.

Because it’s what she’d want.

‘Hey,’ she smiles beatifically down at her Celeste’s Stones brand watch. ‘It’s almost five, why don’t you finish early and go home to Daniel? I’m sure he’s got lots of wonderful presents for you.’

I grin, because he probably has. He’s always been so fun and unpredictable when it comes to surprises.

As it turns out, even I couldn’t have called justhowunpredictable.

CHAPTER FOUR

All the lights are off when I arrive home and, as I pass through the hallway, I wonder for a moment if there might be some kind of surprise party waiting for me in the living room.

Surely Daniel knows me better than that? Hosting a party is in the area of worst nightmares for me. I shudder at the thought. Obviously the theory is to have fun, but I can’t get away from all that horrible fear of no one turning up; the pressure of ensuring everyone is having a good time; the stress of potentially running out of drinks or food; the neighbours complaining; everyone leaving early and bitching about how crappy your house is, or how ugly your sofas are. I can’t see the appeal whatsoever. Evenattendingparties means I need a lie down for three days afterwards. I was OK with planning a tiny wedding as a one-off, but since it has become this monstrosity of an event, I’ve been surviving by telling myself it’s Celeste’s party, not mine. And it kind of is.

Myfanwy describes me as a sociable introvert. Because theweird thing is that Idoenjoy meeting people and talking to them – and especially getting drunk with them. But afterwards I need a lot of recuperation and recharge time.

Thankfully, there is no surprise party in the living room, only more dimness, and I fumble for the overhead light.

‘Dan?’ I call out to an echoey flat, nervousness in my voice. Daniel works from home as a freelance copywriter, so he’s almost always here when I get back. Has he been kidnapped? Murdered? Taken up jogging? I don’t know which one would be worse.

I check my phone. No message from Daniel, only one from Myfanwy asking if I want to be involved in her and Sonali’s summer solstice ceremony this weekend – followed by another message, sternly telling me to stop rolling my eyes.

I shoot Dan a text asking where he is, and then set about checking each room for killers, turning on lights everywhere I go and ignoring the stabs of guilt about the unaffordable electricity bill.

The flat secured, I pause, unsure what to do next. Usually I’d get into my pyjamas the moment I’m home, but what if Daniel has got something planned? Maybe I should be putting on more make-up, not taking it off.

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