Page 31 of Last Call

“Yes.”

“I think I can understand that. You should talk to Andi,” Riley said. “And Jacob.”

“What about you? Other than Dean, you haven’t told me how you feel about any of this.”

“I don’t have the lifelong relationships with any of our friends and family that you do. So, for me, the questions are different. I’d be comfortable accepting Dale’s, Pete’s, or Jacob’s help. If I’m completely honest, I would love to have that connection to Andi and Jacob.”

Fallon nodded.

“But I also understand that it carries a lot of emotions for you,” Riley added.

What would be the point in denying Riley’s observation? It was true. Fallon had been in love with Andi once, more deeply than she’d ever admitted to anyone, even Riley. There had been times when she allowed herself the fleeting fantasy that Andi would leave Jake and they could build a life together.

“Fallon?”

Fallon offered Riley a lopsided grin. Nothing she could say would surprise Riley. “It does carry emotion for me,” Fallon confessed. “There was a time when I thought—no, I hoped Andi might leave Jake.”

Riley smiled. “I know you did.”

“Maybe the issue for me is guilt.”

“Guilt?” Riley asked.

“Yeah. Not about me and Andi. She’s still my best friend, Riley, in a different way than Billie.”

“Or Carol. Or Dale. Or Pete,” Riley added, smiling. “Fallon, you have manybestfriends. They play different roles in your life. But I also know that Andi is the person you trust the most.”

“You’re the person I trust most.”

“Aside from me,” Riley said. “You’re lucky. Not everyone can maintain a relationship with someone they were in love with.”

Fallon sighed.

“You and Andi were best friends before you became lovers. You never faltered in that friendship. I envy you both for that. And I’m also grateful.”

“Grateful?”

“Of course. I miss my mom,” Riley confessed. “But having Andi in my life has filled so many holes. Icantell my mother anything. I don’t tell hereverything. It’s funny when I think about it.”

“What’s funny?”

“Well, my family comes from a city. Mary loves to remind me how muchbiggermy life was on the West Coast.” Riley chuckled. “It wasn’t bigger at all. I had friends. I had my parents, Mary, and Rob. When I think about it, few of my friendships have endured. My life was smaller living there. That’s partly because that’s how my family functioned. My house wasn’t a place to bring your friends. There was always too much tension. And people didn’t stay. I can’t count how many of my friends moved away. Their parents accepted jobs in a different city or state, and our friendship came to an end.”

Fallon listened intently, noting the subtle changes in Riley’s expression as she spoke.

“I married Rob right after college,” Riley said. “Most of my friends were focusing on their careers, travel, and exploring the world. I was looking at houses and talking about babies. I don’t regret my choice, but it made my circle shrink. People faded away. I don’t think it was out of judgment. They couldn’t relate to my life any longer. It happens. The funny part is that Rob and I both wanted to travel. He hoped to open his own business in a few years. I wanted to publish a novel. We wanted to have our children while we were young. We wanted them to see us working towards our goals. And we also wanted to be young enough to enjoy our freedom when they flew the proverbial nest,” Riley explained. She giggled. “We were so focused on what we wanted to create, we didn’t always take the time to sit in the moment. If you’d asked me then, I would have told you that we hadbigdreams and open minds. In hindsight, we were a little myopic.”

“I can’t imagine that’s true,” Fallon said.

“No? It is true. Whiskey Springs was the place I needed to be to find myself, Fallon. One thing I know is that you don’t discover who you are, what you need, or what you desire from life on your own. Back in San Diego, everyone offered an opinion about metome. Here? It’s different. The people I love here listentome. They challenge me, not so I will follow the path that fits their vision of who I am, but to help me find my way.Thatis different. You’re the biggest part of that.”

“And Andi,” Fallon said.

“Yes. And Carol, Ida, Marge, Billie—everyone we love. But yes, Andi has helped me find my way. I’m closer to Jacob and Dave than I ever was to Mary. I know you think that hurts me. Sometimes, it does. I wish I could have developed a close relationship with Mary, one where I could confide in her and cry on her shoulder—a relationship where she could share her fears and dreams and trust me to understand. That’s never who we’vebeen. She told me what I needed and how I should behave. I didn’t follow her advice, but I also never argued with her.”

“Believe it or not, I can relate to that,” Fallon said.

“I’m sure you can. It might sound crazy. I enjoy it when Jacob comes to me because something happened that made him worry about Andi, or he’s annoyed with Dave. Maybe it’s because he actually cares what I have to say. He may not always take my advice. Hewillargue.” Riley laughed. “But he values my thoughts, and I value his feelings.”

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