Page 36 of It's Now or Never

Alex was right. I had been pushing him away just because I was too scared to let my defences down and let him in. Angie’s cautionary words had struck a chord deep within me, but I realised now that I should do as Alex had said and make my own mind up about him, not base my judgement on something Angie had told me. Still, my head was telling me to make my excuses and get myself out of there as quickly as possible – but my heart was telling me something else entirely.

His ran his hand through my hair, kissing me hard on the lips, our mouths opening together as his tongue promised a thousand delights. I pulled back, looking into eyes that were heavy with longing.

‘I’d like that,’ I said, leaning back into the warmth of his embrace. ‘I’d like that very much indeed.’

Back at his flat, Alex made me a warming hot chocolate, put some mellow jazz music on in the background and came and sat down next to me on the sofa, stretching his long legs out in frontof him. If I’d hoped he might have dropped the subject of Angie and what it was she’d told me, I was very much mistaken.

He rested his arm on the back of the sofa, his hand on my shoulder now.

‘I’m disappointed that you were all too eager to believe what Angie said about me. If there was something you wanted to know, you could have just asked me.’

‘It wasn’t like that. Really, it was just a throw away comment. Or two,’ I added with a smile. ‘And it wasn’t only what Angie said. I knew instinctively when we met that we were two very different people. I just couldn’t imagine us being together in that way.’

I wondered why was he so bothered by Angie’s comments. He didn’t strike me as the sort of person who concerned himself with how other people viewed him. And it wasn’t as if Angie had been saying anything too bad about him. She’d hardly been spreading vicious rumours. It was only one friend talking to another. How did we ever get talking about this in the first place?

‘She said lots of lovely things about you too if that makes you feel any better.’ It was a case of damage limitation now. I didn’t want to cause any ill feeling between Alex, Tom and Angie, but maybe it was too late for that. Tom had probably gone straight home to Angie and told her what an interfering busybody her best friend was.

‘I’ve a feeling there’s a “but” coming,’ he said, a smile forming at his lips.

I laughed. ‘Only that you’d left a trail of broken hearts in your wake.’

‘Really?’ He shook his head. ‘That’s unfair and not strictly accurate either. You know, I could sue her for defamation of character.’

‘Don’t say anything, will you? I’ve a feeling, after tonight, I’m already in a whole heap of trouble with Angie as it is. Besides, Idon’t know what you’re getting so hot under the collar about. Are you really telling me that there isn’t an iota of truth in what Angie said?’

‘How do you mean?’ he said, turning on me, his brow furrowed.

‘That you’re not a ladies’ man, breaking women’s hearts at every turn?’ I was teasing him, trying to take the heat out of our conversation, but Alex was having none of it.

‘Absolutely not,’ he said vehemently. There was a fire crackling behind his eyes. ‘Look, I don’t know what her problem is with me. I’ve dated a lot of women, admittedly. I’ll hold my hands up to that, but I didn’t realise it was a crime. I’m a single man, I can choose to do as I please. And I’m always upfront with anyone I ever meet or date. I don’t make promises I have no intention of keeping. If something’s not working then why stay in that situation?’

‘That sounds like a very pragmatic approach to dating,’ I said lightly. It sounded to me as though he was only confirming what Angie had told me; that he was a single-minded, cold-hearted player. A commitment-phobe. Someone only interested in dating and sleeping with a woman before moving on to the next best thing on the block.

‘Possibly.’ He examined the backs of his hands. ‘But I don’t think it takes that long to know whether or not you’re going to hit it off with someone. And there’s no point in hanging around if you know ultimately it’s not going to go anywhere.’

I’d only met Alex on a few occasions but already I knew how charming and utterly, hook-line-and-sinker compelling he was. I’d known that within a nanosecond of meeting him. His chameleon like eyes, searching, questioning and subtly seductive, were enough to wobble the legs of the most level headed woman.

I wondered about all those women he’d left behind and the casual abandon of their hopes and dreams and hearts. Frankly, I could see where Angie was coming from. I didn’t want to be one of the ones he left behind. I’d made myself semi-immune to his charms thanks to Angie. I’d kept her warning at the forefront of my mind and a very firm, well firm-ish, lid on my heart and emotions, even if I hadn’t been quite so particular with my knickers on one occasion. If Alex was going to play any part in my life then it was going to be on a no strings attached basis. I could enjoy his company for what it was; a lovely evening with an undeniably attractive man. The problem would be knowing when to walk away, with my heart and emotions still intact.

‘I guess so. Do you ever think though that some of your dates might have felt differently? That they may have wanted more from you?’

‘What, like Angie, you mean?’ he said, with a touch of cynicism.

‘Angie? How do you mean…?’

‘Nothing,’ he shook his head. ‘Sorry, I guess I’m just annoyed that she’s not exactly been singing my praises as far as you’re concerned.’

‘But you and Angie? There’s never been anything between the pair of you, has there?’

‘No, not really.’ He removed his hand from my shoulder and stretched his arms in front of him, flexing his fingers.

‘Not really?’ I swivelled round on the sofa to face him. ‘What the hell does that mean?’

‘Nothing, honestly. It was just when she and Tom were on a break from each other a while ago, there was a bit of a misunderstanding between us, that’s all. I’ve got a feeling she’s not my number one fan any more.’

I looked at him aghast, trying to make sense of what he wastelling me. Angie and I didn’t have secrets from each other. Well, not really. Admittedly, I hadn’t told her that I’d been out with Alex a couple of times, but that was only because I knew she wouldn’t approve. And I also knew that whatever Alex and I had going on between us it was only ever likely to be a temporary thing. But surely if there had ever been anything going on between her and Alex she would have told me. We were supposed to be best friends.

‘What sort of misunderstanding?’

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