Page 53 of Head Over Wheels

LoonieDunes: Are you sure your handle shouldn’t be Hardcore99?

Folklore99: Are you sure yours shouldn’t be LoonieSoftcock?

LoonieDunes: I’m sorry BallBuster99, but I have to go milk the goats anyway.

Folklore99: … Is that some kind of euphemism?

LoonieDunes: *choke, cough* No! There are real goats. If they don’t get fed and milked, they eat the shed.

Folklore99: Okay… I hope they’re cute at least.

LoonieDunes: They’ve got sweet little faces, yeah.

Folklore99: Go sort out your girlfriends with their sweet little faces then.

Chapter 21

Lori

Seb held up his little mounted cobblestone to cheers from the spectators. The novelty trophy for such a hellish race usually made me laugh, but I was a jumble of conflicting wants and needs as I stared at him from the back of the crowd. I heard my mum’s voice in my head, talking about winners and losers and I had to get back control of my feelings somehow – and find a way out of this mess of my own making. He wasn’t my boyfriend – he’d said it himself. I couldn’t handle a relationship right now, especially not with someone who could put me in such disarray with just one kiss.

I knew I shouldn’t interfere with his career, but threatening to kiss him had worked, damn it! And my cheap fib about making a scene for the media? Actually, that was a great idea.

Scurrying after him into the team bus when the podium ceremony was over, I opened my mouth to say – something, I still didn’t know what – but he just grabbed an old duffle bag and squeezed past me again, his mouth set.

Huh, it turned out Seb could sulk. Was he upset I’d kissed him in public? Or that I’d told my family it was only for the cameras?

‘Seb?’ I called after him.

With a groan of frustration that I would never be able to let those questions go, I went after him, catching up as he stalked to the gate and pushed through without looking at me.

‘Seb!’

His earnest look from December flashed in my memory: the moment he’d made me promise we’d always be friends. For the first time that day, the consequences of my behaviour scared me.

‘Seb! Can we at least talk?’ I said, grasping his wrist, which made him hiss in pain. I knew from experience that he hurteverywhere. ‘I know you don’t like the attention, but don’t you see—?’

‘Is that what you think I’m mad about?’ he asked, giving me a sidelong glance – probably because his neck hurt. ‘Okay, I am really mad about that. If you’re trying to turn me into Gaetano Maggioli, I’ll have to disappoint you. But, Lore, you should be focusing onyournext race, not mine! After this year, I’m gone.’

Confusion rippled over my skin.

‘You’re more than just some guy’s girlfriend,’ he said emphatically. ‘You don’t need to use me to stay in the spotlight.’

‘I’m not—’ I cut myself off, worried he was right.

Seb’s sigh was deep and reminded me of my dad’s exasperated tone – Mum’s weaponised disappointment. ‘If you kiss me, I’d like to think you mean it,’ he said tightly.

‘I did!’ His gaze jerked up to mine with a flash that quickly dimmed to wariness.

‘I mean, I wouldn’t have kissed you if I hadn’t wanted to. And maybe the spotlight thing can work both ways. You could get sponsorship – a contract extension!’

‘I’m not looking for a contract extension.’Of course, I’m not your boyfriend.

‘Why not?’ I cried in frustration. ‘You just came second in the Paris-Roubaix!’

‘It’s a pretty good way to go out with a bang,’ he insisted. ‘I’m your bad-luck charm, Lore – remember? You’ve got to remember that, otherwise I’ll end up kissing you again with everything I’ve got!’

How much I wanted another kiss was unfortunately the only thing that was clear to me in that moment.

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