Page 87 of Head Over Wheels

Catching sight of Lori, I pushed over to her with a sigh. Surely she could see this was no victorious finish. She’d pull away, give me a wave instead of a kiss. That would be for the best, even though it meant missing our last kiss.

Our last kiss… With my vision blurring, I imagined I could see those words on the backs of my eyeballs. I’d always known if there was a first kiss, there’d be a last one.

But I couldn’t do it. Not like this.

I drew away, hoping it didn’t look as much like a flinch as it felt. ‘I’m disgusting, Lori,’ I muttered. ‘We can’t do this any more. You should just go.’

She opened her mouth to say something – disagree with me, I could tell – but I shook my head in warning and turned away.

I needed her to get the message that we were doing the fake break-up thing. She could ghost me again if she wanted. The alternative was saying goodbye to her properly tomorrow, and I wasn’t sure I could survive it.

Chapter 34

Lori

I stormed through the hotel that evening, full of adrenaline and turbulent energy and frustration. Dad saw me, opening his mouth to say something, but he wisely reconsidered. I didn’t know which room was Seb’s, but I was prepared to knock on every fucking door until I found him.

He’d stopped believing, I could tell. He’d forgotten what he was capable of and would write his own failure if I couldn’t talk some sense into him.

I was annoyed as all hell and he would feel my wrath. It was the only thing I could do to hide how much it had hurt when he’d refused to kiss me.

The pounding of my heart warned me I was acting on impulse – chaos muppet Lori. But I didn’t have the luxury of thinking this through – or any idea how long it would take for me to recover from seeing him cruise in, blood trickling down the side of his face.

He was okay. I’d spent the past two hours pausing regularly to tell myself that.

Seeing a swannie with the first-aid case emerging from one of the bedrooms, I took a punt that it was the right one and stomped in before the door could close. It served me right that I was greeted by the sight of my brother’s bare arse.

Whirling around with a groan, I covered my eyes as well for good measure. ‘Can’t you guys ever wear clothes?’

‘I could be happily naked if you learned to knock,’ he quipped through gritted teeth. ‘Did you summon the witch, Frankie?’

‘I strongly advise you to get out of my sight as soon as you’ve covered up your bits, adopted child.’

‘With pleasure,’ he muttered, brushing past me when he was dressed and pulling the door firmly closed behind him.

‘You know, I still can’t tell if you two are really close or worst enemies,’ Seb said mildly from behind me.

‘Both. Always,’ I said, hesitating as I gathered my thoughts as best I could – which was more difficult now I’d heard his voice.

Bracing myself, I turned to find him sitting on the massage table that had been shoved into a corner of the room, a T-shirt in his hand. His shoulder was draped in dressings, with a bandage around his elbow. His eyebrow had been patched up with two little butterfly bandages and his eyes were bloodshot.

‘What time are you leaving tomorrow?’ he asked evenly, throwing me off balance.

‘Early.’

His single, curt nod made me feel out of control. ‘You’ll be able to focus on your training.’

‘Why are you so interested in my training?’

‘You’ve been following the men’s race for days.’ He gave a gruff sigh. ‘I hope it won’t impact on your performance.’

‘I’ve been on the bike every morning,’ I said defensively. ‘Not that it’s any of your business.’

‘But you’ve had enough setbacks because of me. It’s your time now.’ He tugged the T-shirt gingerly over his head and manoeuvred his injured arm into the sleeve.

His calmness – hiswrongness– set me off and I planted my feet in front of him, my hands on my hips.

‘You idiot. It’syourtime, Seb. You’re the one in the middle of the Tour de fucking France. It’s day three. It’s way too early to give up. We all make mistakes. I know you crashed today and I know it hurts like hell, but you need to get up again and hit the road! Leave today behind you. You haven’t retired yet!’