Page 67 of Couple Goals

‘–And when Kira first joined I think she struggled to make friends, because everyone just thought she was this arrogant, I don’t know, lone wolf – but really we were probably all a bit jealous right? Because she’s so fucking brilliant on the pitch,and we were just scared of change, and her being Coach’s favourite. But then Kira was telling me that in her old team, everyone was kind of nasty to her because she was Coach’s favourite, but that’s basically because Coach is like Kira’s most consistent family now, seeing as she’s followed her across different countries and teams…’

Adriana trails off.

Maeve wants to throw her plate across the room. Wants to tip up the table, and scream. She knows it isn’t rational to be jealous of her straight best friend and her former – well, whatever Kira was. But she wishes it washerthat Kira was talking to. The thought that while she’s been alone, crying, feeling like no one in the world cares about her, Kira and Adriana have been sitting around bonding. While Maeve’s been hurting about the captaincy, her friend has been chumming up to the player who took it away from her.

‘Look. I know you might not want to hear this, Maeve, but I say this as your friend. As your oldest friend. Yourbestfriend.’

Maeve’s whole body tenses. ‘Best friend’ suddenly rings a bit false, which terrifies her.

‘If you want to win Coach Hoffman over, and get back in her good books,’ Adriana’s blue eyes are wide and earnest, speaking slowly and surely. ‘You have to mend your relationship with Kira. Whatever it is you don’t like about her, you have to learn to put it aside. For the good of the team, Maeve. For your own good too. At the end of the day, it has to be about the team, right? That’s what football is about?’

‘Oh yeah?’ says Maeve. Her hands are shaking. ‘Did Jacob Astor tell you that?’

Adriana freezes. ‘What– What do you mean?’

‘I saw the two of you yesterday,’ says Maeve. Her voice is harsh. ‘In the park.’

It’s Adriana who is the trapped animal now, her eyes searching Maeve’s. Maeve waits, to see what Adriana says in response. To give her friend this chance to be honest with her on her own terms, not just because she has been caught. Adriana grabs a handful of her hair in her hand, twisting it.

‘We… We just bumped into each other. And talked about… business.’

Maeve’s eyebrow shoots up. ‘Business?’

‘Jacob has nothing to do with decision making about who should be club captain,’ says Adriana hurriedly. ‘Remember, he said? After the first game, he said it’s just his responsibility to ensure the team is making a profit for his bully of a father.’

Maeve’s eyebrow arches. Bully of a father? She is pretty certain that wasn’t something Jacob said in front of the team.

‘He said he respects Coach’s expertise,’ Adriana continues, ‘and doesn’t plan to influence her decisions. It’s not him you need to worry about, okay? He has nothing to do with it.’

Maeve knows it’s hypocritical of her, when she hasn’t told Adriana about the true nature of her relationship with Kira, but she feels so hurt, so disappointed and confused by Adriana blatantly lying to her. Not only lying to her about her relationship with Jacob, but using it as a chance to tell Maeve off about her own behaviour. To act like she’s so high and mighty when really she’s what? Sleeping with the boss? Of course Adriana doesn’t have to feel scared or worried about her future, whenshehas this insider information into the workings of the team, and his good favour to guarantee her place in the squad.

‘It’s Kira you need to concentrate on,’ Adriana urges. ‘She’s your way back into Coach’s good books. Not Jacob. Trust me.’

Maeve can’t stop herself from laughing cynically at that. That word that was always a given between them now feels broken.

‘Trust you? You want me to trustyou? Right now?’ She is so angry she stands up, collecting up their untouched plates, and pacing to the kitchen. ‘Why should I? You haven’t given me reason to trust you. You haven’t been there for me when I’ve been going through all this change, you haven’t been there for me when my mum– You’ve been avoiding me for weeks, lying to me, patronising and insulting me, going behind my back to talk toKiraabout me–’

Maeve’s shame and loneliness come out in one big wave of humiliation and anger.

‘You couldn’t even show up on time to eat a fuckinggalette?’

Maeve opens the bin lid, and throws all their food in.

Maeve stares, shaking, as Adriana just sits there, in her chair where the two of them have had so many deep conversations over the years. Adriana’s eyes are closed, and she seems to be doing some kind of deep breathing. Is she seriously just meditating right now, as Maeve is going through all this? As Maeve dared to try to share her feelings with her, finally, and Adriana doesn’t give a single shit enough to even listen and have a proper conversation with her.

Adriana slowly gets up, picks up her jacket, and walks out the door without saying a word.

Chapter 23Adriana

Adriana avoids talking to Maeve for the rest of the week at training, still in shock and upset at their inability to understand each other or reconcile. She feels so guilty that her keeping the secret of Jacob continues to create distance between them, but after her conversation with Jacob in the bar, she doesn’t feel she has a choice. And it shouldn’t change that she thinks her advice to her friend about being nicer to Kira is still true – yet her friend lashed out, and now there’s clearly no trust between them. She doesn’t think it’s only her fault or Maeve’s, but what she does hate is that she can’t see a way out of them becoming closer again unless something changes. It never stops feeling awful. In fact, her chest has started hurting badly when she thinks about Maeve, as if her heart is literally breaking. When Adriana thinks about it too much, she struggles to breathe.

But she has the best distraction. She has spent every night staying with Jacob. When it’s just the two of them, everything is okay in the world. Lying in his soft bed, head on his broad chest, Adriana feels her whole body, mind, soul, completely relax. Adriana can’t believe how much she has loved doing ‘normal’ domestic things with Jacob.One night they made dinner together – Jacob is a much better chef than Adriana, thank goodness, but she helped go to the shops and prepare the fresh ingredients, and he makes a simple tomato pasta feel like luxury. Another night they ordered in a huge takeaway to watch a romcom together – Jacob had teared up when the lovers finally got together, and Adriana had laughed, kissing his adorable wet cheeks. But then, the morning would come, and they would leave the cocoon of his home, and she would become Adriana the footballer and he would be Jacob the club director, and her chest would start hurting again.

Now, Adriana’s going to have to face the challenge of being ‘Adriana the footballer’ all weekend, because the team have an away match in Liverpool.

The team get in the coach to travel together, Adriana dreading the thought of sitting next to Maeve all journey. But when she arrives, Maeve has already made some excuse to be at the front on her own, saying she has started getting car sick. Adriana feels a bit embarrassed, walking past her, to go and sit next to Kira instead.

‘So you guys hate the Swans?’ says Kira, snacking on a huge bag of trail mix. If the Manchester Tigresses have a rival, it’s the Liverpool Swans.

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