Page 28 of Christmas Rings

Even as she thought it, she knew it wasn’t fair. He couldn’t control what his mother did. Yet, somehow, logic didn’t apply here. He’d failed to protect her. Now she’d lost her identity. What was she now? A cocktail waitress in a strip club. Homeless. She’d have to move in with Mom or one of the sisters.

He wiped his eyes, watching her. “I can see it in your face. You blame me for this.”

She turned her gaze toward the windows. “I don’t.”

“You do, and you’re right. I blame me too.”

She whirled around to look at him. “Fine, I do blame you. How could you let this happen?” The words were cruel and unfair. She knew this, but the anger coursed through her now, hot and red. “We had everything.”

Tears leaked from his eyes. She could see how her words had hurt him, yet she couldn’t take them back. He’d allowedhis mother to ruin their love. It was tainted now with this awful, ugly thing.

“I knew you’d hate me for this.” Jed openly wept through the next sentences. “I should’ve anticipated and protected you, but I failed. I don’t have anything to offer you, even if you felt differently. I walked out of her house for the last time. I’m done. I have no job. No future. How could I in good conscience marry you now, even if you wanted me?”

She went back to the window, leaning her forehead against the cold glass. A torrent of rain fell in slants. She hadn’t minded the rain as she packed. Now it represented the cold, lonely life without Jed.

“Why does she hate me so much?” Alissa asked, numbly, as she turned back toward him.

“I don’t know. I can’t explain any of it. She’s sick. I’m so sorry I ever dragged you into my mess of a toxic family. I should’ve known better than to think a guy like me could be with someone as pure and sweet and good as you.”

She loved him. That would never go away. This man, who’d loved her out of her shyness and convinced her that their bond would stand the test of time, was her one and only. They were naïve to have thought that his family would ever let them be happy. They hadn’t factored in the lengths his mother would go to.

They’d been doomed before they even started.

Her legs trembled, and she sank onto the couch as the awful reality washed through her. Her life as she knew it was over. She wasn’t sure she could ever look at him the same way now. Even if she could look past all of this, if they went forward with the marriage, his mother would be even angrier. God only knew what she was capable of. Would she go after her sisters? Her mom? Mrs. Marsh was rich. Wealth equaled power. Alissa had none.

And what about her family? How would she explain thecalled-off wedding and the loss of her teaching position, other than to tell them the truth about her secret job? They would understand her reasons but would be hurt she’d not told them the truth. They lived under the premise that there were no secrets between Mom and the soul sisters.

“She’ll never stop trying to ruin what we have.” Jed went to her, kneeling at her feet. “Please, forgive me. I vowed to take care of you, and I failed. I’d do anything to take it all back.”

“But you can’t,” she said. “Your mother’s never going to let us be happy.”

“I know, and I’m so sorry.” He reached into his pocket and set a folded check on the coffee table. “This is for you. Something to get you through until you find a new job.”

“Money can’t fix this,” she said.

“I can’t leave here unless I know you’ll be all right.” He spoke in a strangled, miserable voice. “You’ll find someone better than me. Without all my baggage.”

She would no longer be able to roll over and see his face every morning. After this, she might never see him again. She gasped for breath; the air had left the room, leaving pain that pressed into her on all sides. A wail like that of a dying animal came from deep inside her. There was nothing she could do to stop the awful sound.

He gathered her into his arms and stroked her hair as she wept, saying over and over how sorry he was.

“You should go now,” she said, finally. Before I break in half in front of you.

“I’ll love you forever,” he whispered, then rose to his feet.

The slamming of the door was the beginning of theafter, she thought. She’d had theafterbefore, when her parents had died. Jed had been the beginning of a new life. Loving him had given her peace from the grief that had plagued her for so long. She’d actually believed that Mama and Daddy had sent him to her, to heal all the scars of the past.

I should have known better, she thought.I loved him too much. Just as she had her parents. And then they’d left her to maneuver through the rest of her life without them. Just as she would now have to without Jed.

Again, here she was. Alone and bleeding.

Chapter 7

An hour later, when her body had depleted itself of tears, she picked up her phone from the coffee table. She would have to tell her family. Over the last few years, so much had been shared between them, both good and bad news. Whatever it was, despite how different all the sisters were from one another, they were always there on the other end of the phone. For better or worse, Alissa thought, as a wave of bitterness washed over her.

She called Mom and held her breath, waiting for her to pick up and hear what a total failure Alissa was, and that all the money for the wedding would be wasted.

When Mom and her sisters suggested they all meet at Cedar Mountain Lodge regardless, Alissa agreed. She was comforted that part of the financial investments they had all made wouldn’t be wasted.

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