Page 77 of Home Game

“Really?” I kinda like that idea.

“Another call coming in about you. I have to go.”

And then there was silence.

I sat there on the couch for a long moment. The couch where I had taken advantage of Zoey until Jensen’s text had yanked me back into reality. I was such an asshole. I needed to clear my head. I needed to run.

The air was cool.I pulled my hoodie over my head and ran along the water’s edge. What the fuck was I doing? Why had I kissed Zoey? What the fuck was Jensen up to? Was he going after her to spite me? Would he crush her heart? She was so emotionally guarded but so vulnerable at the same time. Last night, during the movie, she had been like a scared cat, flying high in the air and landing on me. That girl was still in fight-or-flight response. Hyper aware, in survival mode. Initially, when I pulled her close, she had been like a stiff little board, unable to relax. And then, I had felt that moment she had finally let down her guard, and she sighed and let go. Letting herself rest against me. How much had it cost her to trust me like that?

I hadn’t wanted to stop holding her. I liked the feeling of her so vulnerable, so open and trusting, snuggling against me. And then I watched her fall asleep in my arms. How long did I lie there looking at her? Knowing I needed to wake her, to be gentle with her. But instead, I had just watched her sleep. Her easy breathing. Wondering what had happened to her to make her so aware, needing to be on guard all the time?

I ran faster.

When she woke up, I knew it was wrong. God, it had been so wrong to kiss her, but I couldn’t help myself. I told myself just one little kiss. When I had lowered my mouth to her, I had been fully expecting her to shove me off but instead, she had made that sound and that was it for me. I was all in. Wild horses couldn’t have pulled me from that kiss.

I ran faster.

Her mouth. I could have kissed that mouth all night. When was the last time I had taken my time to kiss someone like that? Lately, sex had become so clinical. So meaningless. But kissing her, I had felt every second of that kiss, deep into my gut. I had been present for that kiss. All there. Where had I been planning on taking that kiss?

Images of Zoey arching against me while I touched her in my bed flashed through my mind. I wanted her. And I wanted her bad. And I definitely would have taken that kiss all the way.

I ran faster.

God, I was such an asshole.

Zoey trusted me. When was the last time she trusted anyone? I should nurture that trust, not use that trust to get her pants off.

I staggered to a stop, bent over, hands on my knees, gasping for air. I was so critical of Jensen, but how honorable were my intentions? If I hurt Zoey, after she had let me in this far, would she ever recover? And my fucking track record with relationships was bad. I had a trail of weeping, clinging women in my past, all wanting more while I walked away. Which is why I had resorted to meaningless, don’t-remember-your-name sex.

Why was I such an asshole?

I needed to set things straight with Zoey. I needed to protect her. Make sure she didn’t get hurt with myself or Jensen. I needed to get her back on her feet and give her a fucking chance in this world. Messing around with her would only mess her up more.

She needed to be off limits.

I slowly ran back home. I would fix this somehow. And then we would get back on track and if it killed me, I would keep my hands to myself. She deserved more than what I had to offer. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her.

I letmyself into the apartment. Zoey was sitting at the island. She spun around when I came in. Her eyes were wide, on my face. I walked into the kitchen, still breathing hard. I drained a glass of water and then set it down carefully on the island.

Her face looked pinched. She looked upset.

“Zoey.”

“The photo I took went viral,” she blurted out.

“I know.”

Her eyes were big. “Are you mad?”

I rubbed the sweat from my face with the arm of my sweatshirt. “Krista is happy about it.”

Her entire body sagged. “She’s not pissed?”

“No.”

Big blue eyes on my face. “Are you?”

I didn’t give a fuck about the picture. I shut my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. “Zoey. We have to talk.”

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