Page 85 of The Save

My shoulders dropped a centimetre. “She would’ve wanted you to come in.”

He shrugged. “Felt weird. I’m happy for her and Rob, don’t get me wrong?—”

“No, I get it.” I put myself in his shoes. He’d only been gone six months and his ex was engaged and pregnant. Ouch.

Logan glanced at the Ranchman’s sign. “Why are you leaving so early?”

I scoffed. “Baby showers aren’t exactly ragers.”

His mouth curved at the edges, and I was glad for the moment of normalcy between us. I hadn’t ever hated Rob, but I didn’t like who Shar was when she was with him.

“Maddie has a boyfriend?” Rob asked.

I exhaled. Well. He cut right to the quick. While I’d loved being with my friends, in the last week, I’d become their fifth wheel. It was better to take off before it was so obvious it became embarrassing.

“How long are you in town for?” I asked, ignoring his question. If he wanted more details, he’d have to walk through that door.

“Uh . . .” He gave a nervous smile. “Indefinitely. I’m playing with the Blizzard.”

My jaw dropped. “You . . . what?”

He smiled, and a little of the old Logan sprung to life. “Yep, kind of exciting. I wanted to tell the guys, but it seems like they’re more of a package deal now.”

Logan took a step back toward his truck. “Will you let me know when the baby comes? I feel weird asking Rob, but I wanted to get them something. ”

Something in my chest tugged. “Mmhmm. Sure.” I pulled out a pen from my purse. “What’s your number?” Logan rattled off the numbers, and I wrote them on my palm.

He thanked me, then gave a little wave and got in the truck. His taillights blinked red, and just as he pulled away from the curb, the door opened to Ranchman’s.

“What are you doing?” Maddie yelled. “She’s about to open your gift!”

I groaned internally. What was I supposed to tell her? That I’d left and decided to walk so slowly to my car, I was still directly across the street? “Just getting some air.”

Maddie pushed the door further, waving for me to come back in.

I glanced up the street, but Logan’s truck was long gone. I started back toward the door, taking one last look at the numbers on my skin and slipping the pen back into my purse.

I wasn’t going to tell Maddie or Shar about seeing Logan, not tonight. It could wait for the next girl’s night.

“I think you’re too independent with your own car,” Maddie teased. “How are we supposed to force you to stay longer than you want?”

I laughed. “Looks like you’ve still got it figured out.”

Maddie threw her arm around me and pulled me back into the pub.

Epilogue 2

Maddie’s letter, postmarked July 28th, 1995. Arrived return to sender September 16, 1995 and immediately read by Chase Wilson.

Chase,

I’m sorry it took me so long to write. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, too. When we met, I was dead-set on applying for the Rhodes, and I know right now you’re yelling at this paper saying “You’re still going to apply for that damn scholarship” so don’t hate me for what I’m about to say next.

I’m not going to submit. Not because of you, so you can breathe easy. I realize that you’ve committed to your job in Vancouver and it’s probably unlikely that the two of us will cross paths in any long-term way anytime soon. That breaks my heart a little. I didn’t say anything when you left, not because I didn’t want to, but because you’d made it clear that you didn’t want to try.

So here goes. This is my best attempt at explaining the thousand things running through my head in some sort of conglomeration that makes sense.

I think I love you. There. Got that out of the way. You told me once that wanting doesn’t make a difference. That it either is or it isn’t. To that I say (as you taught me), “No thank you.” Wanting makes all the difference, and here’s my proof:

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