Page 35 of Knotting the Cowboys

Four Alphas and a baby, displaced because I can't decide if I'm brave enough to keep the gift my grandfather left me.

The thought sits like lead in my stomach.

"I don't know," I admit, fingers still tracing wood grain like it might hold answers. "I don't know what I want to do. Everything's happened so fast, and I'm not...I'm not good at quick decisions anymore."

No. I don’t have the confidence in tackling things head-on cause look where that got me?

Alone. Abandoned. Set up for dead because I hoped for a future I clearly didn’t deserve in those Alphas’ eyes, despite everything I did to make them comfortable, secure, favored in the eyes of their fellow Alphas who were ready to outcast them because of their continued fortune of bad luck.

Until little Miss Willa came saving the day with her naive hopefulness of love and a pack that would accept all of me.

I really was blind.

"Then don't make one," Cole says simply. "Take your time. We'll keep things running while you figure it out. No rush, no pressure. Just... time to breathe."

Time to breathe.

When's the last time anyone offered me that?

My chest tightens with something that might be gratitude or might be terror at how badly I want to accept.

"What about..." I gesture vaguely at all of them, at the space between us that fairly crackles with unspoken awareness. "Won't it be awkward? Me being here, you all working..."

"We're professionals," Mavi says firmly. "We've maintained appropriate boundaries with William for years. This is no different."

Except it is different.

William wasn't an unmated Omega who made their Alpha instincts flare.

Didn't smell like vanilla and maple, and endless possibilities that can make Alphas and Omegas go wild in between the sheets.

And most certainly wouldn’t make them feel so close to losing their control over their needs as Alphas.

I pretended not to notice how Cole had been reacting the other day, but I noticed.

Heck, I was easily leading him into it…

I’m not innocent.

I have needs…that haven’t been attended to for who knows how long…

But can we really live here comfortably together with no complications?

"Just think about it," River encourages. "No decisions today. Just... consider the option."

I nod, not trusting my voice. Under the table, my hands shake slightly. So many questions crowd my throat—why did my grandfather trust them so completely, how did Luna come to be, what aren't they telling me about their past?

But exhaustion wins over curiosity.

Or I subconsciously don’t want to deal with potential confrontation that wouldn’t fall in my favor?

"Okay," I whisper. "Okay, I'll think about it."

The tension in the room eases fractionally, though I can still feel the weight of things unsaid.

Luna chooses that moment to voice her opinion, a happy shriek that makes everyone smile despite the heavy conversation.

"Someone approves," Austin laughs, and the sound breaks through my anxiety just a little.

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