Page 130 of Arturo's Temptation

No, B… You know as well as I do that I fell for Luca faster than I thought imaginable. There’s no rhyme or reason for this. It just… is.

My heart stalled as I thought back to that first moment, the first time I ever laid eyes on him. I had never despised someone so much or so instantly. It was like I had no control over my feelings. Everything about him had rubbed me up the wrong way. The smug, arrogant way he held himself. The fierce,unwavering determination he had to push me beyond my limits. The stubborn, relentless way he pursued me…

The way he smells. The frustratingly beautiful lines of his face. The way he’s always been able to make my body vibrate with desire with a single look. The sexy, effortless way he moves his body when we’re training.

It had all been a smoke screen… all the reasons I’d had for hating him. Fear of how attracted I had been to him had made me push him away hiding from how I honestly felt. The truth was I was already head over heels in love with him. I had been falling in love with him the second he’d called me princess and warned me of what was to come.

P was right, I am in love with him. And a part of me knew…

I blinked, a frown appearing on my forehead as I mulled over what to do. My hesitation wasn’t because I didn’t want to tell him. God knows I did. I wanted to yell it from his rooftop, but saying those three very important, consequence driving words would cement all of this in stone. Once I said it there would be no going back. There was no putting that genie back in the lamp. And the sheer thought of doing something that could cause irreparable damage to my family and most importantly Arturo was… unthinkable. It was either a man of my father’s choosing or the single life for me. That’s how it had been for my parents.

What was I going to do?

Besides, even if I could tell him, I had a hard enough time expressing love for myself let alone others, losing people tended to have that effect on me. It was why I had spent my life running from any whiff of romantic love. I couldn’t go through that kind of heartbreak. It wasn’t worth it. And knowing my father? He would destroy whatever Arturo and I had before it could fully develop. That scared the shit out of me. But what terrified me more was how quickly I had fallen for Arturo. I had never wanted to cling onto anything before him.

There were no choices left. All I could do was hang onto Arturo for dear life…

No matter what my father said or did, and hope to god that we found our way through.

Arturo squeezed my knee jolting me from my thoughts.

“I’m goin’ for a cigarette. You good here for a moment?” He asked as if he hadn’t just announced he was in love with me.

Men!

“Y–yeah, I’m good,” I managed, as he leisurely stalked toward the balcony door. It appeared like a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

Nobody outside of my family, other than Peyton of course, had ever told me they loved me before. What surprised me was how damn good it felt but strange at the same time. Hearing the man you love tell you they love you for the first time was like no other feeling in the world.

I focused on his silhouette on the balcony before taking in his home. It was sparse. Somewhat clinical and cold. It made sense though. Arturo seemed at his core a minimalist. Someone who carried no personal attachments or trinkets. Other than the photographs in his room he didn’t have any other… treasures. It must have been so jarring, moving into our house that was loud, full of life and colour, and full to the brim with family.

I carried on looking around the room and finally clocked a photo of a loving couple having a picnic in the park. The woman was familiar. As I continued to stare it dawned on me that she was the same one from the photo in his room…

That must be his mom.

Arturo was the spitting image of the man in the photo, who I guessed was his father, but his striking eyes and full mouth had definitely come from his mother.

No wonder he was so good looking.His parents were stunning!

By their feet sat a young Arturo, who looked as though he didn’t have a care in the world. His smile reached from ear to ear and his eyes shone with happiness. He must have been Theo’s age if not a year older. He looked relaxed… loved. A direct antithesis of the man he’d become. A man who harboured darkness and battled daily against his demons and flaws. A man who would take a bullet for me and stand up to anyone who tried to keep us apart.

Next to the photo in the park was one of his father sitting on his bike, Arturo between his legs, smiling at the camera. My heart squeezed as I thought of his bike now sat in my garage as a pile of scrap metal. He shook it off, but I knew he carried the devastation of losing the only thing he had left from his father every day.

I wish there was something I could do.

Maybe there is… Come on Bells, think.

And, can we just take a moment to appreciate that fine specimen of a man saying I LOVE YOU?

I know…

Okay, so… why didn’t you not say it back?!

I want to. Fuck, I want to. I’m just… scared… Sick to my stomach, terrified.

You don’t need to be, trust me.

“Who you talkin’ to,amor de mi vida?” Startled mid conversation, I glanced towards the balcony door to see Arturo sliding it closed. The cool air caused my skin to pebble and I shivered, running my hands up and down my arms.