Page 43 of The Beach Holiday

Then it seemed my very thoughts had summoned her. I heard footsteps scuffing against the dusty pathway and then heavy breathing. Then a long shadow was cast across the threshold as a tall female figure now stood there looking in at me.

I felt my stomach drop and my mouth became dry. If Ula was as unhinged as everyone said she was, then I was a trapped animal. I had nowhere to go. I thought about the books just to my right by my feet. The rough guide to Fiji was almost brick-like and could be a good weapon should I need to fling anythingat Ula so I could get out of her shack and to safety. I stood waiting, to see what she would do. Would she scream at me, or would she give me instructions to run again?

She walked through into the cabin. Her height both astounded and unnerved me; I hadn’t imagined her to be so tall. She almost had to crouch to come in through the doorway. I noticed the blood on the crotch of her trousers. And now I knew that the handprints on the outside had been made with her menstrual blood. Ula was someone who bled freely. Another reason her campmates didn’t want to come near her maybe. Her long light blonde hair was tied back in a very loose ponytail. Even though she had blocked most of the light out with curtains, I could see her eyes lacked sparkle, her expression, dull and lifeless, seemed to match the ambience of the room.

Then she spoke. Her voice was low and husky, which surprised me initially, then the words she uttered startled me even more.

‘Well, this is a nice surprise. I was wondering when you were going to stop by.’

32

THEN

I was still trying to figure out what I was supposed to do when Ula stepped right into the room and pushed me firmly, so I fell back into a small hardbacked chair next to the bed.

‘Guests must sit when they come.’ There was an edge to her voice. I could now see that she was twitching slightly, maybe some sort of tick.

‘I’ll make tea.’ She shuffled to the table where there was a small gas stove. She began trying to light it, but it appeared not to be working. Perhaps it hadn’t been working for some time and Ula was just going through the motions, doing what she thought she was supposed to do when a guest arrived at her home. I gave her one minute of trying to get the gas stove to work and then I cleared my throat.

‘Ula, it’s fine. I didn’t come here for tea.’

She turned at the sound of my voice and for the first time I was able to get a good look at her in full view. She had on what looked to be harem pants that perhaps had once been turquoise or blue, with a very faded gold pattern crawling up the leg. What I could see was how utterly filthy they were.

‘I, I came to see you, because I was told you lived here. Alone.’

Ula scratched at her head, her ponytail looking as though it might fall loose any minute. I imagined she didn’t wash her hair, and now she was stationary I could see it had begun to mat in several places as though it were trying to form dreadlocks.

‘I do live here. Alone,’ she repeated.

I looked around the shack again, searching for something to focus on for inspiration so we could start a conversation.

‘You have lots of lovely things. Did you collect them all yourself?’ I asked her.

Ula looked at me again. I pointed to the shells and such on the table just behind her.

‘The shells and driftwood. Did you collect it all yourself?’

She turned and gently put her hand on one of the pieces of driftwood. A small piece, grey and knotted. She looked thoughtfully at it, and I wasn’t sure she was going to reply, or if she might freak out or cry, perhaps I had touched a raw nerve.

‘Someone collected them. For me.’

I nodded. ‘Nice.’

I had so many questions for her, but where was I supposed to start?

‘Ula, I wanted to ask you if you were okay.’

She pulled her face into a frown. The she turned back to the gas stove, attempted to light it again.

‘Do you want some tea?’ she called over her shoulder.

I let out a long breath. ‘Sure, let’s have some tea,’ I said.

Was Ula pretending she didn’t understand my question? It was hard to know what her true state of mind was. But I could tell that a piece of Ula was missing. Was this the obligatory piece that we all came with but had to forsake for our time here in paradise? If it was it seemed to me that Ula had got the raw end of the deal. I did not know her or who she was before she came here, but she seemed to be someone who had lost a part of herself somewhere along the way. I wanted to help Ula. I wanted her to trust me.

Ula gave up trying to get the gas hob to work and turned around. For a second she seemed shocked to see me there, as though she had forgotten I had been sat behind her.

I smiled so she wouldn’t feel any sort of threat from me.

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