Page 103 of Ace My Heart

Brad dropped his arms, and the look on his face made guilt roar in my chest. I shouldn’t have kissed him back last night. This new, strange awkwardness I felt in his presence was the consequence. I hoped that it would wear off. I hoped that by the time I got back from Wimbledon, things would be back to normal, the kiss in the car forgotten. I doubted it would be that easy somehow.

“I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am, Mel,” Brad said formally. I reached out and touched his arm briefly.

“Thanks, Brad.”

“You had a special connection with her,” he added.

I smiled at him again, a little warmer now. I felt Joel’s hand move from my shoulder to my waist. I ignored the tingling his touch sent through me. Or tried to ignore it anyway. Unsuccessfully.

“I was about to take Mel out for lunch. Do you want to come?” Joel asked.

Brad glanced at me, eyes wary, then shook his head. “No, thanks. I’ve got classes this afternoon anyway.” He turned to me. “Mel, I’ll see you when you get back from England?”

I nodded.

“Well, good luck.”

Brad leaned in and kissed me on the cheek, then stepped back and, giving me a wistful look, he turned and walked away.

“That was … awkward,” Joel said as we headed towards the Opera House. I turned and looked at him, expecting a smug expression. But all I saw were serious, pouty lips, and eyes that cut through me like blue diamonds.

Stupid me, I wanted him to kiss me, so badly. When I looked at him, I could understand the things that Brad had said to me … ‘there’s so much that I want’…

“Well, if it’s going to be that awkward after thirty seconds of tongue kissing, I’mreallyglad I didn’t take him to bed.”

Joel chuckled then. “After what the world knows about Melanie Black’s bedroom antics, I think Brad Jacobs wouldn’t have been able to walk straight for a week!”

I scowled. “You know, I am capable of sex that isn’t … pornographic.” I grated the word out. “In fact, I quite like sweet, vanilla sex, when it’s with the right person.”

I just hadn’t found that person yet.

Joel sighed. “Of course you are, Stinky. So, what am I buying us for lunch?” He moved his arm back up around my shoulders. Was it wrong that I was disappointed that he wasn’t caressing my hip anymore? Yes, it was.

“I don’t mind, Joel. If you’re paying, then whatever you decide will be fine.”

We ended up getting dumplings from Opera Kitchen and sitting on the steps of the Opera House to eat them. The sun was finally burning away the chill in the air, and I took my coat off and sat in my cardigan, enjoying its warmth on me.

Joel finished his lunch and leaned back against the steps, propping himself up on one elbow and facing me.

“Have you heard anything more from the police?” I asked tentatively. Joel shook his head.

“I’m starting to wonder whether they’ll ever solve them,” I said.

“Wouldn’t be the first time murders went unsolved.”

I turned to face him. “Aren’t you desperate for justice? I mean, it was your dad and your uncle, Joel.”

He shrugged.

“Finding who did it isn’t going to bring either of them back, is it? I don’t know if anything would make me feel better about it. I’m certainly not counting on anything making me feel better anyway.”

Thoughtlessly I reached out and grabbed his hand. His long fingers clasped around mine.

“How are your nightmares?” Joel asked. “They didn’t seem to worry you on our last trip overseas.”

I shrugged. “They come and go. There were a few nights afterBen when it was bad again, but it’s almost like I’m so used to them now that it doesn’t shock me the way it used to. I don’t know. I’ve just learned to live with them.”

Joel threw me a dubious look, but when I didn’t elaborate, he sighed.

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