Page 119 of Ace My Heart

“Well?” I prompted. Joel sat down and picked up his cutlery, taking a bite.

I was starting to feel silly for asking when he replied, “We go home, and we start working towards the US tour.”

I shook my head. “You know what I mean! This isn’t going to … change things, is it?”

He looked thoughtful for a moment. “Mel, nothing has to change if you don’t want it to.”

I felt my brow furrow in confusion. “If I don’t want it to,” I repeated. Joel fixed his blue eyes on me.

“Doyou want things to change?” he asked. I bit my lip, not sure how to answer that.

“Well, no … I suppose not,” I replied. As soon as the words left my mouth, I wished they hadn’t. I didn’t want to decide now when I was so confused. And so tainted by the incredible night of sex we’d just shared.

But it was too late. Joel shrugged, his eyes flicking away from mine and off into the distance. “Great! No change then.”

I leapt in headfirst. “But, Joel,everything’schanged now! We can’t just pretend that last night never happened! I don’twantto pretend it never happened. What if I want to do it again?”

What if I want to do it every night for the rest of my life?No, I couldn’t say that to him!Bad, terrible idea, Mel!

Joel smiled at me, that smile that he used when he wanted someone to melt for him. But it was too late for that with me – I was only beginning to feel the first inkling of just how too late it was.

“Stinky, if you ever want to do that again, you just let me know, and if I’m free, I’ll be there.”

I grunted. I really didn’t like the way there was anifinvolved. But really, what had I expected?

I shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “Yeah, well, it was fun. I guess if I’m bored some time, I might take you up on that.”

The smile slipped from Joel’s face just a tad. Clearly that hadn’t been what he wanted to hear. Well, it was give and take. If he wasn’t prepared to give something more to me than just a fuck, then I wasn’t prepared to give him my body.

Woah, wait a second! WhatdidI want from Joel? My brain was too scrambled to answer that.

I remembered a time when he’d told me that all good relationshipsneeded good sex, and I’d thought that if sex was all you had, then how could you possibly have a meaningful relationship?

But over the last few months Ihadbuilt more with Joel than just a teasing relationship and one night of the greatest sex of my life. Hadn’t I? There had been times when he’d been sweet, and protective, and kind, in between the teasing. He always had my back. He made me laugh.

But if he wasn’t going to put his heart on the line, there was no way I was going to.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Misery

Ahero’s welcome greeted me at Sydney Airport. I wasn’t feeling very heroic though. I felt gritty and tired, and I was sure that I had sleep crusted all over my eyelashes. But people didn’t seem to care at all – they just wanted to wave flags and posters and cheer at me.

And of course, there were several TV cameras with journos waiting to accost me with questions.

Joel grinned and took my carry-on luggage out of my hands.

“Go bask in your glory, Mel,” he muttered in my ear. I raised my eyebrows, but didn’t look him in the eye as I moved into the fray to sign some autographs, pose for pictures that I’m sure I looked disgusting in, and generally just give people a piece of me that I didn’t have to give.

When I managed to fight my way free of that debacle, I spotted Joel waiting for me near a café.

“I wish I’d been able to shower before I had to get through that crowd,” I muttered grumpily. “I feel like a troll.”

Joel gave me a sidelong glance. “Yeah, you’re looking pretty troll-like, actually.”

I couldn’t tell whether he was joking or not. He’d been all strange since the Night of Amazing Sex. He fluctuated wildlybetween Jokey Joel and Serious Joel. I couldn’t get used to his mood swings.

I wondered if this was what he was always like when he had sex with a girl he’d been pursuing for a while.

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