Page 101 of As You Walk On

“All of it?”

He nods. “At least Jay’s POV.” His bicep nearly bursts through the Mountainview jacket as he brushes a hand over his hair. “Most of it I put together on my own.”

“Uh-huh.”

A smirk pulls at my mouth watching his arrogant expression. Darren Holmes, true detective. He and Dad would make a great crime-solving duo.

“But if you want to fill in some of the blanks...” He leans against a pair of lockers behind him, timid eyes surveying me. “By all means.”

I hunch forward, elbows on my knees, digging fingers into my hair. The room is fairly quiet. The occasional drip from a showerhead in the distance. That one halogen light that needs to be replaced buzzing like a fly. Anxiously, I tap my spikes on the cement floor. Anything to dim the noisy replay from Saturday night in my head.

“What’s there to tell?” I ask, launching into an abridged version of what occurred before Darren can respond.

He listens intently, his face remaining neutral.

After I finish, he says, “I figured as much” with a frown.

“Are you mad at me?” I ask after a long pause.

“Mad at you?”

“Yeah, you know.” I toss my hands up. “For not speaking to you on the ride back to Jay’s. Or explaining things then. I dunno...” I rub the back of my neck, unable to look him in the eye. “For being an asshole about your great night when—”

“When you were having such a shitty one?”

Well, yeah. Not that I say it to him.

Guilt rattles me, though. How did I ever think Darren would intentionally ghost me? That his heart hasn’t always been in the right place, even if he wasn’t? That he wasanythinglike... Jay? I couldn’t help myself.

“Theo, bro.” His hand rests on my shoulder. “I’m not mad you iced me out.”

“Technically, my pops grounded me. No phone. No internet.”

“Wow. Bet that was rough.” Darren snorts, then quickly collects himself. “The only person I’ve been mad at is myself for not pulling you aside to talk more. Speaking up when I knew Jay was in the wrong.”

He squeezes my tendons until I raise my eyes. “I should’ve done better.”

My nose wrinkles. It’s the same thing Makayla called me out about—being quiet when I should use my voice to check others. The same thing I wanted Jay to do for me at SpeedEx.

“I won’t hold it against you,” I say with a half-hearted laugh.

“Youshould.” He grins crookedly. “Best friends have a lot of jobs. Speaking up, even if it makes others uncomfortable, is a priority.”

I return his grin.

“Even when I’m not there-there,” he starts, patting my shoulder now. “I’ve always got your back.” He puffs his chest, showing off his Mountainview clothes once more. He’s a total dork, but the honesty in his voice is indisputable.

Clearing my throat, I say, “Thanks.”

Everyone’s allowed a selfish. Self-care too. But knowing your friends can do both and still be there for you matters.

I stand and stretch. “Since we’ve been mutually terrible friends lately...”

Darren squawks, feigning offense as I unzip my hoodie before hanging it in my locker. I sigh, continuing, “Tell me all about—”

“Whoa, whoa!” Darren staggers back, eyes wide. His stare lands on my midsection.

Right. Almost forgot.

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