Page 107 of As You Walk On

“I know.” He yanks blades of grass up. I wonder if he’s upset I took one of our traditions to another group. That there are others who know a side of me I didn’t show him. Darren eventually says, “You can have both, Theo. No one’s gonna question your loyalty. Friendships shouldn’t have limitations. The only rule is don’t be a dick to people you care about.”

I chuckle. “Like Jay.”

“Like Jay.”

After another pause, the wind mercifully brushing over us, he says, “They’re your friends, so fix it.”

I get the sense Darren doesn’t need me to reply.

He rolls onto his back, smirking at the slow-drifting white clouds like he’s never been wrong about anything in his entire life.

21

OUR GHOSTS NEVER LEAVE

“To the left.Not there. To theleft.”

“Okay, Beyoncé, I hear you,” I mumble, re-centering a standing ring light that’s almost taller than me for the fourth time.

Makayla glares from in front of an all-white bookshelf thatistaller than me.

“Choosing violence today, I see,” I whisper.

Snark probably isn’t wise considering Makayla’s the only one from our little group currently speaking to me. Luckily, I didn’t have to resort to pleading with Jayla to get Makayla’s attention. Nope. Good old-fashioned social media begging did the trick. Although, she left my DM on read for forty hours before agreeing to meet up.

Let the record show I didn’t creep on Luca’s account just to see his crinkle-eyed smile. All I’ve been receiving in the hallways now are glimpses at the back of his head as he pointedly walks in the opposite direction. I also didn’t create and quickly delete a finstain hopes of sending a follow request to Aleah’s private account.

I have some dignity left.

(Barely.)

“Here?” I sigh, repositioning the ring light.

“Perfect,” she replies while checking the glow intensity in her phone’s camera. “Was that so difficult?”

Instead of complaining that, yes, setting up the light—along with helping her detangle fairy lights as well as reorganizing her books so the spines formed a rainbow palette—was indeed grueling, I flop on her bed, wincing when she throws me another stink eye for messing up her pillow collection.

“Sorry.”

She sighs dismissively, turning away to study her shelves. I predict an inevitable headache in my future.

I let my gaze roam around her bedroom.

Hardwood floors stained dark. Hanging shelves stuffed with trophies and awards—cheerleading, gymnastics, drama camp. Sheer curtains let in enough late afternoon glow to make everything appear sharper. Her throw blanket feels hand-quilted with the kind of care an elderly relative puts into crafts. On the wall behind her desk is a framed poster forWicked, which I’m guessing is her favorite musical since there are at least two photos of her dressed as Glinda for Halloween.

The rest of the room is all Brook-Oak Cheer Squad swag and...

“Um. You have a lot of—”

“Books?” Makayla follows my eyes, lips pursed. “Wow, you really think I’m nothing but a stereotypical cheerleader? Mean girl philosophies, ponytails, and a weakness for rumors, huh?”

“No.” I wrinkle my nose. “I mean, Iprobablydid. I’ve made a lot of unfair judgment calls in the past.”

Neither one of us mentions Jay’s name. I’m sure we’re both thinking it.

“Thrilled I was the one to change your opinion,” says Makayla without any real heat in her tone. A half-hearted smile dances across her lips.

“Anyway,” I say, plucking a stuffed penguin off her bedside table that Makayla quickly snatches back, “that’s why I’m here, right? For your dare. Help everyone—myself included—get to know therealMakayla.”

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