“Not that I heard, Nessa.We’re gonna head back over there soon.Tease wants to come over and spend some time with you.He lost his shit the second Rooster got the news and he’s not allowed to leave the compound until they get a concrete lead about where Knuckles is.Did you know they’re actually cousins as well as best friends?”Joseph informs me, his voice a whisper as he calms Kaden back down while walking around the living room.
“I did know that.Knuckles told me when he gave me his past.It doesn’t surprise me that he’d lose his shit.Those two are closer than any two men I’ve ever seen in my life.It also doesn’t surprise me to know Rooster isn’t gonna let Tease out on his own or with one other guy to search for Knuckles.He knows Tease will go rogue and put himself in danger to save his cousin and best friend,” I say, my voice cracking as I push myself off of Aaron’s lap and stand to go in the kitchen to pull the pizzas from the oven before they burn.
Before I can move far from my baby brother, Daniel moves past me and heads straight for the oven to take out the pizzas.At the same time, there’s a knock on the door.I make my way there to find Tease standing with tears in his eyes.Without a word, he pulls me into his arms and holds me tight.
“I’m sorry, Janessa.So fuckin’ sorry I wasn’t there to protect him.I won’t leave your side until we find him,” Tease whispers, his voice breaking and causing my heart to shatter even more with how much this man is hurting.
“The club will find him and bring him home, Tease.We have to believe that,” I whisper back, my voice not much better than his.
Tease continues to keep me close as we make our way in the cabin and to the couch.Without hesitation, Joseph hands Kaden to Tease.I watch as Knuckles’ best friend holds his son in his arms and doesn’t look at anyone other than the baby.My brothers dish up dinner and make calls to whoever they're gonna bring in to help find Knuckles so they can bring him home.The entire time, I take one or two bites of my pizza and keep my eyes locked on Kaden and Tease as if my son will vanish next.This is the worst feeling and I want to help bring Knuckles home, but I don’t have the first clue about what to do.Fuck!I’m useless!
Chapter Nineteen
Knuckles
THOUGHTS OF JANESSAand Kaden fill my head as I slowly wake up.Even with the pain filling me from head to toe, I can’t stop thinking of them.They’re the center of my world and I don’t know when it happened.All I know is everything I do moving forward is with the two of them in mind.Opening my eyes as much as they can, I try to look at my body to see how much damage has been done to me.From what little I can see, my chest is bare and covered in bruises and cuts.I can feel road rash on the right side of my body and know if it doesn’t get treated soon it could turn into one huge infection.Blood covers what’s left of my jeans and I can see more skin than my pants at this point.Laying just past my feet is my cut and what’s left of my tee-shirt.Rage fills me seeing my cut on the floor like a heap of shit.These fuckers aren’t respecting my colors and have disrespected me more than anyone else ever dreamed of doing.They’ll pay if it's the last thing I do.
On top of the physical damage I can see wrong with my body, my head is pounding.I’m not sure if I have a concussion or not, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I do.Especially since I can’t remember everything that happened.I know I had lunch with Mallory at our normal diner.She’s eager to meet Janessa and Kaden.On my way home, I remember realizing someone was following me and took the back road to get away from the innocent drivers surrounding me.That’s when I was shot and my bike went down.After that, there’s absolutely nothing.Plus, I feel as if I’m about to lose the contents of my stomach.That’s never a good sign.
I’m suddenly overwhelmed with the knowledge that I can’t be there to protect Janessa and Kaden.I have no clue how long I’ve been gone or what they’re doing right now.Is she at her office?Have Roger’s parents gotten their hands on her?Is this all a diversion for someone to take my family away from me?The questions form one after another and I can’t push them out of my head.Each question only leads to the worst possible scenarios running through my mind.Of my girl being taken and held against her will.Roger getting out of jail somehow and getting his hands on her once more.Of him harming our son because he’s not his son.
Starting to struggle against the chains holding me tight to the chair, I know I need to get to my family.That used to only mean the members of the club.Now, when I think of my family, it’s Janessa and Kaden.They’re the two people I think of as soon as I wake up in the morning and the last thoughts I have before falling asleep are of them and our future.I’ve never once felt this way about another person in my entire life.Even with the little bit of blood family I have left, I’ve never once felt the overwhelming urge to give my life for them.I’d do it if that’s what’s needed, but it’s overwhelming when it comes to the woman I want as my ol’ lady and the son I want to raise to be the best version of himself.
I want to have more kids with Janessa.To experience every second of her carrying our son or daughter.The good, bad, ugly, and beautiful.Every single second, I want to create a million memories with them and give them all the best parts of myself.I want to be the best version of me I can be and that’s because of a woman and little boy who stole my heart and filled me with a love I’ve never experienced before.Now, I need to get the fuck out of here so I can fulfill all the dreams I’m starting to have when it comes to them.
The chains holding me hostage rub my skin raw and I know I’m doing more damage than what’s needed, but I can’t remain here.Especially since I have no clue who the fuck has me or what they want.With the little bit of vision I have, I look around the room I’m currently being held in.The carpet is so thin it’s worn completely bare in places.I can’t tell if the walls are supposed to be painted white or a dingy brown color.There’s so much grime, dirt, dust, and other substances coating every single surface.The lone window in the room is barred on the inside and I know I won’t be able to escape that way if I manage to get out of this fucking chair.With only one door in the place, I know there’s no bathroom or closet wherever I’m being held.This shit is disgusting and I know it’s a breeding ground for infection to build in the wounds I have from the accident and whatever has been done to me since being taken.
Moving my body, I try to move the chair.It’s not bolted to the floor like we have at the clubhouse.That’s their first mistake.If I can make it to my cut, I can hit the tracker Brick made us all get.We never know what’s going to happen from one day to the next.While situations like I find myself in aren’t common, we can’t ever rule out that this will happen to one of us at any given time.Keeping my eyes darting around the room as best as I can, I slowly move the chair closer to where my cut has been tossed carelessly aside.
“Fuckin’ rat bastards!”I growl out through gritted teeth as rage fills me to the point it threatens to make me black out.“I’ll kill every fuckin’ one of them before this is over with.”
That’s a promise I’ll take to my grave.I’ll rid the world of all the evil that gets close to my family one person at a time.
It takes forever and I’m covered in sweat by the time I finally manage to get close enough to my cut where I can press down on the tracker so I can be rescued.If I thought the pain was bad before, it’s nothing compared to now.My body is on fire and it’s not going to take much for me to pass out once again.Still, I manage to move my foot just enough to press down on the tracker sewed into the lining of my cut.It takes me a minute to find it, but I eventually do and press down harder than necessary so I’m positive it goes off and Brick can trace my location.As soon as I’m sure the tracker is now alerting the guys to my location, I let myself pass back out.This is the only way I’ll be saved quicker than normal.
As the blackness surrounds me and pulls down where I can’t feel any pain, images of Janessa and Kaden fill my mind on a loop.It’s never really stopped, but now the images are turning darker.Instead of Janessa’s smiling face, she’s in tears and a shell of her former self.Kaden is older and has a darkness to him a child shouldn’t ever be filled with.I know that darkness because I’ve been filled with it most of my life.It’s never something I want any of my children to be consumed by.I’ll die before I let that happen.