Page 129 of The Only Heart that Matters

“You’re right, buddy. Grandma Sharon is waiting to see you. We better get going.”

Chapter Forty-Nine

Sawyer

Eight and a half years later.

“Hey, kiddo, how you doin’?” Mom asks from the doorway of my room.

“A little nervous, but I’m good.”

“You know you don’t have to do this?”

“I’m not nervous like that. I’m excited nervous.”

“As long as you’re sure?”

“Mom, it was my idea. Stop worrying.”

“Okay, okay.” She holds her hands up in surrender. “Let’s get going then. Everyone’s waiting.”

Itwasmy idea. After years of making wishes when I blew out my birthday candles, I decided to grant my own wish. Since I’m the only one who could really grant it anyway. One day, a fewweeks back, Dad and I were in the barn when I finally got the guts to talk to him.

“I know what I want for my birthday this year.”

“What’s that, buddy?”

Oh, man. Why am I so shaky? I’ve wanted to ask him this for so long. I just hope I’m not too late. Maybe he’s changed his mind. Maybe Grace and Aidan are enough, and he doesn’t need me to be his anymore.

“Sawyer?” he says, his head tilted to the side like he does when he’s wants to know more.

“Well, you’ve been asking me for a really long time and I’ve always wanted to say yes, but I was too chicken. I don’t know why.”

“Bud, are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“Only if it’s what you still want?”

“Of course it is!”

He drops the brush he was using on his horse and walks over to me. He picks me up in a great big bear hug and then sets me down on my boots.

“Have you talked to your mom and dad about this yet?”

It always makes me feel icky when he calls Knox my dad, but I know what he means. Knox is my father, but I call him papa. He has a say in the things I do, not just Mom and Angus. But it makes me feel bad for dad, because I’ve always lived with him.

“No, I wanted to make sure you were okay with it first.”

“Bud, I know you have a father, but I hope you know I love you as much as I love your brother and sister. There is no difference to me. You are my son, in here,” he says, pointing to his chest.

I try not to feel embarrassed when tears sting my eyes, but I tell him what I’ve always felt to be true.

“Gus, you’re my dad. I know Knox made me, and I do love him, he’s a great papa, but you’re my dad. I want to have the same last name as you and mom and Aidan and Grace.”

He hugs me again. “I love you so much, Tater.”

Finally ready and dressed in my wedding clothes, as I like to refer to my khaki pants and long-sleeved button-down shirt. It’s because of all the buttons that it took me so long to get ready. I’m surprised to see Dad dressed up in a suit and tie. Mom, Gracie, and Aidan are also wearing their fancy wedding clothes. But it’s Dad and his big smile that makes me so happy. I knew this was a big deal to him, but it makes me feel all weird inside to see how excited he is. It’s more than happiness, but I’m not sure what you’d call it.

Angus can’t adopt me, because Papa Knox is my actual dad. He’s always around and we go riding at least once a week unless he’s out of town. I know he loves me, and I love him too, but Gus has been my dad for as long as I can remember.

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