Page 106 of Unbearable

“Is grass gluten-free?”

Red stares at his daughter standing in front of him, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “Maybe, why?”

She hands Red the worm, in two pieces. “He looks hungry and I think his tummy is sensitive so we need to find gluten free grass to feed him.”

Red sets his beer down next to him and brushes away a ladybug that’s landed on her shoulder. “Well, he’s also dead, darlin’. I’m pretty sure gluten-free grass is the least of his worries.”

Nova’s eyes flood with tears as do mine, for different reasons when I remember my mom telling me about ladybugs and my dad. It’s a gentle reminder he’s always here with us.

“Do you have some tape?” she asks Red, that same flood of tears spilling over her sun-kissed cheeks. “I’ll just tape him together.”

I’m actually a little shocked she’s nearly crying over a worm. You rarely see that kid cry unless she’s throwing a tantrum over something.

I’m not sure how or where, but she manages to find tape.

“Don’t worry, wormy,” she says, carrying him over to a rock. “Tape is gluten free because it’s clear. No additives.”

Red looks at me and then Lenny. “What the fuck do they teach at that school?”

Lenny laughs, watching Nova. “No idea.”

The Fourth of July party at Mom’s house has always been huge. Everyone is invited. Friends, family, neighbors. I’m not surprised when I see Berkley there either, nor am I completely prepared when she approaches Tyler and I as we’re eating burgers on the deck.

“I heard about your accident,” she says to Tyler, primarily, though she gives me that side-eyed once over. Berkley’s never liked me. Mostly because I threw gum in her hair when she first started dating Tyler and she had to cut like four inches off her hair. The gum had Gorilla Glue on it. I never said I was a nice kid. I was in the womb with Rawley. He rubbed off on me a little.

Tyler stares at her, setting his burger down, probably wondering where she’s going with this.

And then she smiles at him. “Just wanted to see if you were doing okay. You look good though.”

Shut up. Stop talking to him. D and V are going steady and there’s no room for your slutty self here!

Tyler nods and leans into my side, a gesture I appreciate so much more than he’ll ever know. It’s a statement. One that silently tells Berkley he’s finally taken for good. “I’m fine.”

Bringing her beer to her lips, she takes a drink and then smiles once more. “Take care of yourself.”

Never once does she acknowledge me.

“That was awkward,” he says, shaking his head and reaching for his burger again.

My heart beat that had suddenly started racing, evens out. “No kidding.”

Lenny finds us then and plops down next to us with a bottle of water in hand. “What’s this?” she motions to our closeness. “Are you a couple now? Is it out in the open and no hiding?”

Red approaches as she asks, winking at me as if to say he’s completely okay with it.

Tyler’s arm wraps tight around my shoulder. “Yep.”

Lenny glances back at Red. “Told you they’d get their shit together eventually.”

Tyler snorts picking up a chip. “It was less than a year ago when I could have said the same thing about you two.”

There’s certainly no denying that. I think in many ways both Lenny and Red understood our situation, in part, because of what happened between them. Whatever the reason, it’s a relief that we’re together and we can be out in the open with no hiding this time.

WE’RE SETTLING INTO the night, sitting around eating burgers and ribs, music blaring from a set of speakers to our left when Jude asks Lenny to dance. He’s our cousin but he’s constantly teasing Red that if he slips up, he’s taking Lenny. I wouldn’t doubt Jude would try either.

Relaxing back in his chair, Red rakes a hand through his hair. There’s a slight smile playing at his lips, the only indication of his annoyance is his tensed jaw. Usually seeing Lenny dance with someone else might set him off but not Jude. He’s harmless.

It still doesn’t stop him from cutting in though.