Page 101 of Happy Hour

I understood that he was distracted, but Jesus, finish a fucking sentence.

I really wanted to punch him in the face right then, but I didn’t. That would probably ruin the moment. Remembering the mere days I had left, I didn’t want this moment to end.

When he threw himself into his movements, I was distracted from my thoughts of punching him.

There was no holding back any longer. His entire body jerked in time with his release, his head buried in my shoulder as he held my body tightly against his.

He collapsed his entire weight on me, his breath hot and rapid on my neck. I stroked his back and shoulders while my own breathing and heart rate returned to a normal pace.

Exhaling heavily, he slid to one side nestling me against his chest.

I liked the nestling. Nestling was good.

We laid there quietly staring at each other, listening to the sounds of the wind and the occasion crack of thunder. The soft sounds of our breathing mixing with the sounds of the storm filled the salty air between us.

What was he sorry for? What did he say to me in Italian? I have to know, it’s driving me fucking mad.

“What did you say to me?” My words seemed to hang for a moment like the air between us seized.

“Huh?” His brow furrowed his gaze upon me, eyes guarded.

“In Italian, what did you say and why do you never finish what you’re going to say to me when we’re...” I motioned between our bodies.

His breathing increased and then he swallowed as though it was difficult to say. With my chin resting on his chest I could feel his heart beat quicken. “I...uh...” he pushed me gently from his chest and rolled to his side looking at me, his green eyes burning into my own. “Is this...what is this between us?” he asked, his voice was different, low and anxious, wary even. His eyes searched my own for any indication he could get.

“Friends with benefits...Ithought.” I responded quickly.

“Is that all it is to you?”

“Is that all it is to you?” I countered without answering.

He was quiet for an entire minute, believe me, I counted all excruciating sixty seconds.

I have rarely seen Jameson struggle for words. He usually possessed an elegant poised grasp of most situations and his suave confidence bordered on cocky most of the time. Even when completely furious, he was never at a loss for words. Until now.

When he spoke, I was surprised at how tense and unsteady his voice had now become. “No...it’s not.”

My heart was beating a million miles an hour, thudding loudly in my ears. The blood was rushing rapidly throughout my body spreading like a summer wild fire. “It’s not for me either.” I agreed. “What did you say to me in Italian?”

His eyes closed and then slowly opened as though he was giving himself a pep talk. “What do you feel for me?” he asked softy, damn near inaudible.

“What?” My eyes searched his.

Still, I couldn’t tell him.

He sighed softly. “Sway, what is this for you? Don’t tell me you don’t feel something more for me. Don’t tell me this is just sex anymore, because it’s not Sway. I see it in your eyes—I feel it when you touch me. Youfeelsomething more for me.”

“Itneverwas just about sex for me, Jameson.” I stated as a tear slipped down my cheek. He reached for my face brushing it away with his thumb. I could feel the trembling in his hand return. “What did you say?”

“I said,” he blinked quickly, his gaze falling to his hands. When his eyes returned, they were lustrous. “I said...I didn’t mean to fall in love honey.” The shock on my face must have registered because he hastened to add. “I’m sorry.”

“You fell in love, with me?” I gasped. I was expecting something along the lines of; I like you more than friends but not love!

He gave me a tentative but uneasy smile. “I did, I’m sorry.” His eyes dropped. “I know that I can’t be the man you need. I’m notgoodfor you. I know that. I knew what I was getting myself into but Ihadto know. I had to know what it was like, to be like this with you, as though you wereonlymine—even if it was for only three weeks.”

“Huh?” I looked at him as if I had no idea what he just said. I really did have no idea what he said, or at least I couldn’t comprehend it.

I think my plan wasn’t my plan at all. I was so confused.

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