Page 175 of Black Flag

“Keep coming, three...two...one...wheels straight, foot on the brake bud.”

After ten seconds I wasalready pounding on the wheel. “Come on!” I screamed. “Let’s go, let me GO!”

“Go, go,go!” Kyle finally said as they removed the jack. “Straightout, clear one lane,”

I gained a spot on pitroad, which improved my mood slightly. “Thanks guys, nice pit stop.” Though Isounded irritated, I wasn’t. I was just...nervous?I didn’t get nervous when I raced but today, I think I showed some emotionsdictating that said feeling.

The pit crew was doinga good job tonight but like I said, I wasn’t settling for anything but the win.I knew regardless if I won or not, the chances of me winning the championshipwere good. But have you ever heard that saying, “You can’t have you cake andeat it too.”

I think that statementis another crock of shit. Whoever said that, obviously failed at something andmade that up to make them feel better about losing.

“It’s time to step upto the plate.” I told myself as the green flag dropped.

I wanted to know formyself that those sacrifices that I couldn’t figure out why I was making wereworth it.

My mind drifted back tothe days when I first started racing to now and how mechanical it seemed in asense. When you first start out racing, your mind is constantly scramblinginside that car about how each move will affect you and the outcome of therace. And that’s not to say you still don’t think that way years later but it’sdifferent. With practice, more seat time, your moves and reactions grow surerand going high when you usually wouldn’t almost becomes second nature. It’salmost like muscle memory, your body just reacts and anticipates the signalyou’re giving it. All along you’re collecting notes, your mind developing morememory and responses to the situations until you’re faced with something new.You respond, and find the answer you didn’t know was there. An answer youdidn’t think you had. A move you didn’t think you would make, you do.

Numerous circumstancesplay a part in a race. Pitstops,lapped traffic,caution flags, wrecks, flat tires, as well as strategy. It’s all about how wellyou play against the circumstances andswingthem toyour advantage. There was a moment of disequilibrium when those around you arevulnerable and a sudden unexpected fate turns to your advantage. It’s what youdo in that moment when you make a difference against the circumstance playingagainst you. And the move you didn’t think you’d make turns out to be the moveyou needed.

By lap two-fifty six, Iwas running second behind Tate. I thought about what he said to me in Dover.

“I shouldn’t say that toyou, because I know damn well if you can pull yourself together and get thatdrive, that determination in you back, I don’t stand a chance for a repeatchampionship.”

I smiled and nudged himfrom behind, waving. I raced him fair, but I wasn’t holding back. He put up agood fight like I wanted him too. We bumped and banged for a good ten lapsbefore he finally just went high and let me go with a wave.

“All clear—go get ‘em!” Aiden told me.

You couldn’t miss the excitementin his voice, in everyone’s voice. Our team was in its first year in the cupseries and to come out here and do what we’ve done...it’s unheard of.

You honestly never knowwhen your team will find unity together and it may not even happen the firstyear. Unity between the crew and car chief, crew chief and driver, driver andowner, are all different and unique in their own subtle ways. It’s a rhythmlike any other rhythm and one you need to win a championship. It can happenover a meal, at the table full of empty beer bottles, on the team plane ormaybe at the track during a race where the right call was made or a quick stop.Some find it and others never do.

We had found it andonce you have a drink of victory like we had, nothing will stop you fromplaying with fire to quench the thirst of desire. I knew that fire very well bynow.

“White flag next timeby.” Kyle said. “Come on bud give me onemore goodlaplike the rest of them! Hit your marks one last time kid, you deserve this.Goddamnyou deserve this kid!”

Did I deserve this?

Fuck yeah I did.

That last lap was thelongest lap that I’d ever driven in my career. It felt as though I was drivingacross country.

It also felt like I hadan incredible amount of time to reflect on what this actually meant to me.

Besides the glaringobvious and Doug Durran in 1950, I was the youngest driver to win the NASCARWinston Cup Series Championship and the first to win it in his rookie season.

The excitement andemotion I felt was hard to describe. My entire body shook as I came out of turnthree. The roars of my screaming team over the radio, was enough to rupture myeardrums. Yeah, we had unity all right.

I was a champion.

“YEAH!You guys are fucking awesome!” I screamed for all Iwas worth.

Pounding my fists onthe steering wheel, I took the checkered flag for my twelfth victory of myrookie season, and myfirstNASCAR Winston Cup championship.

My dad was the next onthe radio. “Fuck yeah Jameson! You’ve proven it time and time again—but you didit today!” he choked. “I’m so proud of you!”

Then Kyle wasscreaming, “I knew you could do it!”

I once again had somany emotions running through me. Relief, excitement, anxiety...you name it...I was feeling it.

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