Page 106 of Room 4 Rent

A game in which one team does not get any hits; a rare feat for a pitcher, especially at the major league level. Also called a “no-no.”

SYDNEY

2 YEARS LATER

You know in the movies when the final credits start and then pops up details about how everyone’s life goes after the movie ends? I love that because you don’t have to wonder that way.

I’ll give you a rundown of the last few years. It’s been crazy, so hang on tight.

Emmie, she’s sixteen now, and driving! Can you believe it? So, fetch. Ha. That’s not actually a word she uses. She’d say something along the lines of, my car is so totes lit. Or something like that. I’m probably fucking it up. Anyways, she still comes over and watches the kids for me when I need a break.

Kids… you noticed I used the plural version, didn’t ya?

Hold on, I’ll get to them.

First, Ez finally scored with my sister. After a year of trying. Not sure if that surprises you or not, but I figured you might appreciate his efforts there. He’s also playing for the Pirates and talks to Cason at least once a week. And, Emmie has a huge crush on Ez. Don’t tell her I told you. She’d no cap, be so mad at me.

Remi is dating a man her own age, and no, he’s not Cason. She made me meet him the day they went out just to be sure I didn’t know him and had Nahla do a background check on him.

Speaking of Nahla, she’s great and successfully avoided Forest and his attempts to bag her, as he called it. I don’t know what happened to Forest, but from what Cason says, he’s playing triple-A ball in Alabama.

Nahla and Kenneth welcomed a little boy after eight years of trying to get pregnant. Nathan Grayer. With black hair, blue eyes, creamy olive skin, he looks just like Nahla, and he’s the sweetest little boy you’ll ever meet. I’ve tried to kidnap him twice. Both times they asked for their kid back.

And for my own baby, she’s five now. Turns six in a month and is no longer obsessed with Olaf. The character, that is. After the Disney incident, she never watched that movie again. Now she’s into Fleetwood Mac, begs for dreadlocks, and started playing the guitar last month. My sweet little gypsy girl. We still have the snow-white cat we call Olaf, and he’s an asshole.

Let’s see… what else?

Oh, uh, we had a baby! Like how I casually threw that in there?

Kinda like how Cason knocked me up. Game two of the series against the San Diego Padres. Nine months later, Alston Lucas Reins made his appearance. Our rambunctious one-year-old is the spitting image of his father and more than I can handle most days. He’s also the best thing that’s ever happened to our unconventional family. Tatum treats him like her doll, and he lets her. Goes with anything she wants him to do.

Also, my baby daddy is a major league pitcher for the Los Angeles Angels and still holds the world record for the fastest pitch ever thrown.

And guess what else?

He’s fucking faithful.

Do I worry?

Nope. Never. I don’t need to. Just because you’ve been wronged in the past doesn’t mean you need to put up a cage around your heart and swear off love and trust.

We’re not married, yet, but this time it’s different. I have no expectations, and it feels good. I know the drive on I-10 between Phoenix and Anaheim like the back of my hand and when Cason is missing us, he makes the drive in four hours and thirty-six minutes. For the past couple of years, through countless games and late-night calls, and one very determined little boy making his entrance into the world while his daddy was two thousand miles away, we’ve made it work.

You know in romance movies when the couple gets together, everything’s great, and then bam, dick to your face, cockblocked? Shit went south? They’re suddenly disagreeing over something like who left the ranch out after pizza? By the way, if you don’t eat your pizza dipped in ranch, you’re missing out. If you’re frowning at me, we can’t be friends. But my point is, suddenly the couple—let’s call them Jack and Jill—that perfect couple Jack and Jill were portrayed to be are suddenly fighting over something so incredibly trivial, but it brings them to this point.

They’re human. You can’t sleep in the same bed with someone every night and agree on everything all the time. Anyways, back to Jack and Jill fighting. Sometimes during their fight, it gets brought up that Jack’s pissed that Jill didn’t give him head last night. Jill was taking care of Johnny and Jane. Yes, so they got kids too. Don’t get lost on me. Follow along.

So, there they are, fighting over the ranch, and Jack suddenly brings up the fact that he’s pissed about her not spending time with him, and Jill’s just trying to get through the fucking day without losing her shit on the kids and CPS being called. She doesn’t have time to suck your dick, Jack. So back the fuck up here.

In romance movies, this is what they call the arc. The pivotal moment in the movie where the music changes, your popcorn is gone, and there’s nobody chewing in your ear, and here you are wondering why Jack can’t see that it wasn’t because Jill didn’t want him. It had nothing to do with that. She was simply tired.

He tells her she’s not herself anymore, and he feels like she’s pushing him away. She had no idea he thought that, and part of her, deep down, knows he’s right. They go to bed, neither speaking, and the silence turns to days. He starts rebelling, she withdraws, and then something sparks inside them, and they suddenly have this lightning bolt hit them, not literally, let’s hope, and in the middle of the night, their feet touch under the covers, and a silent conversation plays out between them. He confesses he’s sorry; she admits life is hard with Johnny and Jane. I mean, they’re teenagers, and teenagers are assholes. Nobody likes them. They don’t even like themselves.

Regardless, the ranch started a ball rolling, got their damn feelings out, and now they’re good. All’s better. They’re having sex as the credits roll, and you leave the theater thinking, did I leave the ranch out? Because it’s got you concerned. It’s after, maybe when you’re in your car driving home, that you think about that movie and its true meaning.

We hide our feelings for the sake of an argument. Until the goddamn ranch goes bad.

My point?

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