Page 139 of Lost in Love

There’s a reason for that, and it actually had nothing to do with me running late. Okay, it did, but there’s another reason.

Fear of Trisha. Just wait until you actually meet her.

Have you ever seenAlice in Wonderland? You know the Queen of Hearts lady, right?

That’s what Trisha looks like. I’m not lying. Every time I look at her, I have this fear she’s going to say, “Off with their heads!” and chop my head off. Before you label me a pussy here, I had a bad experience one time on a subway in New York where this lady, who was kinda sorta dressed like the Queen of Hearts, offered to give me a blow job when I was seventeen. I was seventeen and it was a blow job. I still said no though because she looked fucking crazy.

Turns out, I was right. She was crazy and proceeded to lick my shoulder for an hour on the subway, and when I told her to stop because it was making me sick to my stomach, she tried to cut my throat with a plastic knife and said, “Off with your head!”

I never returned to New York and never will.

“Why do you have her watch them? She’s crazy.”

Madison waves me off. “Just because some cat lady who looks like Trisha tried to cut you with a plastic knife doesn’t mean Trisha’s crazy.”

“I don’t trust her.”

She reaches into her purse as if my concerns for our children’s safety means nothing to her. “She nearly killed me.”

“Who?”

“The Queen of Hearts lady.”

“Oh my God, you’re such a baby.” Her smile tugs at her lips, and I feel like I’ve at least accomplished something here. Opening the door to her car, she gets in, and I push myself away from my truck to stand closer. “Can you pick them up or not?”

“Yes, I can.” I stand with my body in the door of her car so she can’t shut it. “Can we talk tonight?”

It’s not hard to miss the way her smile fades and the panic sets in. “Sure.”

Sure. She gave me a sure. That’s a start, right?

Backing away, I allow her to shut the door because I have to get back to the jobsite, finish with the plumbing inspector and attempt to get at least a start on hanging drywall.

The entire way back to the jobsite, I keep thinking of the way she said sure. Like she wasn’t sure, but wanted to. I can’t help but think she doesn’t want the divorce. She couldn’t, could she? We’re perfect for each other. We get along, we laugh, we have great kids and similar upbringings.

Part of what drew Madison and I together was our similar childhoods. A father missing from the picture.

And then I think, is that why she wants a divorce? Because she thinks I’m missing from the family?

Well, I admittedly gathered that much last night, but I keep going back to the fact that she said she didn’t love me. I have to show her that love is still here.

My ideas range from bringing home flowers to maybe a gift, but would anything material convince her I loved her? She knew I’d buy her anything and everything I could. And she knew I loved her so it had to be more.

Chocolate cake? She’s a sucker for flourless chocolate cake. Baking it myself would probably score me the most points, wouldn’t it? Too bad I can’t cook. The last time I tried I caught the microwave on fire. In case you’re wondering, if you make cup of noodles, remember to add water to the cup.

When I’m back at the jobsite, Brantley’s hanging drywall in the living room with Trey, who I thought wouldn’t be back for a few more days.

“What are you doing here? I thought Brantley said you were advised to take a few days off.”

Trey pushes his black hair from his face, nervously watching me. He mostly talks to Brantley and not me. Though he’s never said it to my face, he thinks I’m intimidating. I don’t know where he gets that from. I’m a pretty easy going guy to talk to, right?

Maybe don’t answer that.

“Um, I know they did, but I need the money and I can’t miss out on work.”

I can understand his drive and need to work. I’ve been there before. But… I follow rules. Most of the time and Labor and Industries isn’t someone I’m about to fuck with.

Turning to the counter, I grab my drywall saw, and he backs up. “You can’t until you get a note from the doctor that says you’re cleared for work.”

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