Page 15 of Paper Hearts

Arya and I stand up and she jumps in the water, chasing after Roman, but I stay on the dock, hesitant.

Ender smiles at me and it sends my heart racing. “What’s it gonna be?” And then he tucks me into his side.

I find it hard to breathe. He’s touching me and my entire body is shaking. I wonder if he notices. “My dad would be really mad at me.”

Ender raises an eyebrow and suddenly his face is serious. He glances at my lips and then back to my eyes. “Is he home?”

“No.”

There’s a simple careless shrug of his shoulders I find fascinating. “Then he won’t know. It’ll be our secret.”

The way “secret” rolls off his tongue makes me want to press my mouth to his lips and be his secret. “You get in a lot of trouble, don’t you?” I ask, fighting my smile, desperately wanting to be as wild as he is.

“Enough.” His eyes move to the boat. “You coming?”

“Is it safe?”

“Oh fuck no.” He laughs. “My uncle is crazy. Stay close and don’t let go of my hand.”

And then, without warning, he slides his hand into mine and leads me into the water. For the first time ever, a boy is holding my hand. I can’t tell you anything that happened on the boat, other than I don’t think I stop smiling and know without a doubt, Ender James will forever be someone I can’t stop thinking about.

6

WHEN I SPIED ON HIM

“Can you stay at my house tonight?” Arya takes a bite of her mustard-covered hot dog.

“Maybe.” I shrug, squirting ketchup and relish on my own hot dog. It spills over the edge and onto the paper plate in my hand. Arya hands me another Pepsi. “I’ll ask.”

I know my parents and they’re gonna say no, but I’m gonna try anyways.

Ender walks by with Walker and Roman, baseball bats and gloves in hand, and a white bucket in another, heading for the driveway. When Ender is near the table on the deck, his arm reaches over my shoulder, stealing my Pepsi I opened. Walking backward, he takes a drink, his eyes on mine.

I gawk at him and frown at Arya. “He stole my soda.”

Arya hands me another one with a roll of her eyes. “It’s because you have boobs.” She stares down at her own, flat chest, cupping them with both hands. “Someday, babies. Someday.”

“Where are they going?” I ask, laughing at her.

“Baseball practice. Ender and Roman made it on the varsity team their freshman year. Walker’s trying to make it.” Arya rolls her eyes. “Anything Ender does, Walker thinks he has to.” She watches them and then nods to my house. “Go ask your mom if you can stay over.”

I’ve never been allowed to stay at a friend’s house. My parents have these very strict rules. I suppose they have to with five teenage girls. Little do they know my sisters are constantly sneaking out and into the beds of who the hell knows. I don’t even think they know sometimes.

But then there’s me. Hadleigh. The shy baby Hayes girl who no one takes seriously. Underestimated and rarely recognized.

* * *

Around supper time,I head over to my house for the answer. I’m nervous because I can already hear their denial. I want so badly to stay the night over there I even write what I’ll say on my hand for backup.

“Arya wants me to stay at her house tonight, can I?” I ask, approaching my parents on the dock just before the sun is swallowed by the lake. Dad’s home from work, and I know he wants some peace and quiet. It’s a horrible time to ask, but I do. I’m eager and I want to get it over with.

He doesn’t look up from the can of beer he’s holding, but my mom is waiting for him to say something.

I chew on my bottom lip and pull at the strings on my bathing suit under my shorts. When he doesn’t say anything, I try harder. “Please? I haven’t gotten to spend the night at someone’s house yet and Harper got to before she was my age.”

“I see what you’re trying to do here.” Dad chuckles with amusement, squinting at the last remaining sun peeking from the trees. “I know they have two sons. Doesn’t that one you’ve been running around with the last couple weeks live there?”

Crap. He’d noticed more than I gave him credit for, didn’t he? Harper lies. I never do. Now that I’m playing that card, I try to think of what she might’ve done in this scenario. I can almost picture her pouty lips and batting her lashes at him. I do the same thing.

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