Page 17 of Anti-Hero

I never questioned if this job was the right fit because it was always more than a career. It’s my name. My family. Parts of myself I can’t extricate from the whole. And I’m determined to not justbehere. Tosucceedhere, even if it’s been hard to summon much enthusiasm about the inevitable. Walking into this building on Monday, pretending not to see the stares or hear the whispers, wasn’t mymade itmoment. I still need to earn that. Getting this job might not have been an accomplishment, but I’m going toaccomplishwhile doing it.

“It’s an adjustment period,” I say. “I’ll figure things out.”

“Ah, yes. This”—Lili waves an arm around my large office—“must be a change from your former career, doing whatever the fuck you wanted.”

I roll my eyes. “Speaking of hard work, there must be a shoe store nearby. You only have a million pairs. Better get shopping so you can fill up Charlie’s castle.”

She tries to glare, but her twitching lips ruin the full effect. “Fine. I am late to meet Bridget and Fran. But before I go, I need a favor.”

“No,” I say immediately.

Lili manipulates her mouth into an exaggerated pout. “You haven’t even heard what it is yet.”

“Ialreadydid you a favor. I’m going to the damn dinner, okay? Whatever it is, figure it out your?—”

“It has to do with Collins …” she lilts, cutting me off.

I reach for my coffee, buying a few seconds of response time as I swallow a large sip, scalding my tongue. Lili tracks the movement, and I worry I’m actingtoononchalant.

“What does?” I ask.

“Well, you remember Collins. She was my?—”

My eyes narrow. She’s messing with me.

“I remember,” I clip.

“I had dinner with her last night.”

My knee bounces beneath my desk.

“She moved to New York a few weeks ago. And she’s looking for a job, so I said I’d check here. But now that I know you need an assistant … hire her!”

I stiffen with shock, but Lili doesn’t appear to notice. She’s busy spouting more information I already know—Collins is smart andtalented, and I’d be lucky to have her.

Monty said she left her job in Chicago, I recall, but I was too distracted by the high of having her in my hotel room to think through what that meant. To ask if she’d found a new job.

Collins is proud. If she admitted to Lili she’s unemployed, she must be struggling to find a job. Must need money.

And I handed her a check for having a drink with me like a total dick. Also bragged about my high credit card limit, if I’m recalling correctly.

“Kit!”

I refocus on Lili. “What? I’m listening.”

“No, you’re not. Plan out where you’re partying this weekend after I leave. I thoughtCollinswould keep your attention. You used to have the biggest crush on her. Although, if she’s working for you, you’d have to treat her like any employee.” She wags a finger at me like I’m one of Dad and Mom’s misbehaving beagles. “Noflirting. Keep it professional.”

I don’t ask my sister howprofessionalme fucking Collins in a hotel room was. I just gulp down more coffee, barely feeling the burn as the hot liquid scorches my throat.

“So? You’ll hire her?” Lili presses.

I’ve never appreciated her persistence, but I’m especially resentful of it right now.

Monty didn’t tell Lili we’d slept together last weekend. I’m certain, and I’m not surprised.

When I woke up in the Seashore Suite on Sunday morning, the other side of the bed was empty, the robe was hanging on the back of the door, and the dress was gone. The only evidence that the entire evening wasn’t a vivid dream was the second used glass and the rippedremnants of a check mixed with the condom wrappers on the floor.

It happened, but I doubt it will happen again. Collins was using me as a distraction from the mess she’d left behind in Chicago. And, I’m realizing, from the stress of job-searching.

---