Page 6 of Her Inconvenient Wedding Date

“Tell me again why you’re helping the girl you like go out with other guys?” The low voice on the other end of the phone line that’s questioning my sanity belongs to my cousin Ryder. He and I have always been close, especially since we’re the only male cousins in our respective families—we both happen to have two older sisters. Despite his own unsuccessful love life, he’s game for helping me with mine. “How is this a good idea?”

That’s precisely what I’ve been asking myself the past hour while Lily’s been on her date with Engineer #3. Tucked away into a corner booth at Kirin, a Chinese restaurant in Mountain View, I have the perfect vantage point to observe her and this Simon guy who are sitting at a table about twenty feet away.And don’t worry, I am observing, not spying. As the only non-Asian guy in this place, I couldn’t be discreet even if I wanted to be. But I do try to speak as quietly as possible, so no one assumes I’m here to crash Lily’s date.

Even though that’s exactly what I’d love to do.

“She asked me for help, so how could I say no?” I reply in between bites of my beef chow fun. “I’d do anything for Lily. Wouldn’t you do the same for Amelia?”

He grunts instead of answering my question. Things with his ex-fiancée are a bit complicated right now, but I know Ryder still cares for her a great deal. When he starts sounding like a caveman, you know it’s serious.

“I do have a plan,” I continue as I pick up more food from my plate with my chopsticks. The carrot slices I put into my mouth match the bright color of the seats and walls. There’s so much orange in this place, I couldn’t see green if I tried. But inside, I am envious. I wish I was the one sitting across from Lily, enjoying her company. “I figure when her date goes south, I’ll be right here to swoop in and save the day—er, night.”

“Wait, don’t tell me you’re spying on her right now?”

“It’s called observing.”

“But does she know you’re observing her?”

“Not yet.”

“So, you’re spying.”

“Or maybe I’m enjoying a good meal out, so I don’t have to cook tonight, and I happen to be at the same restaurant as Lily and her date?”

“Then you’re eating and spying.”

“All right, I’m spying.” I take a sip of chrysanthemum tea to wash down the oil from my meal. Too bad it can’t also clear my guilty conscience. “I wanted to get a look at my competition.”

“And? What do you think?”

I crane my neck so I can see better and size up my opponent. Simon looks like a decent guy, albeit somewhat uptight with his shirt buttoned up to his neck and a very somber expression. I don’t understand how anyone can hold back a smile around Lily. “It looks like someone’s forcing him to eat bitter melon.”

“Blech. I have no idea what that tastes like, but it doesn’t sound pleasant.”

“But this is good news for me. Simon’s not her type, so that means this date will be one and done.”

“That’s great and all, but what about the next guy? How many dates are you planning to spy on?”

“Well, based on the research Lily and I did this afternoon, she needs to go on 3.7 dates a week to increase her chances of finding a husband within three months.”

“So, that’s 44.4 dates? You’re sure going to be busy, cuz.”

As soon as I hear the total, I gasp. It’s not because I’m impressed by Ryder’s ability to crunch numbers quickly in his head—it’s in our genes because I can do the same—but by the specific number he stated. In Chinese culture, the number four is off-limits because it sounds like the word for death.While I’m not superstitious, I find some humor and validation in this situation. If Lily’s dates go down in flames, I can be her hero who brings romance back to life.

After all, she already compared me to Clark Kent. I just need to keep my contacts in and play the part of Superman.

Speaking of contacts, I realize I haven’t been moving my eyeballs much during dinner. I blink, then begin scanning the restaurant from left to right and back again. That’s when I notice something new on Lily and Simon’s table, and it’snot a dish.

“Hey, cuz, I just got paged,” Ryder suddenly pipes up. “I’ll talk to you later.”

I’ve lost track of the number of times my cousin’s had to end a phone call because of work. It doesn’t bother me, though, when I know he’s literally saving lives. His job as a doctor makes mine pale in comparison, but I feel like I’m on a mission to do a little saving tonight. I’m ready to fly, figuratively speaking, out of my seat the instant Lily needs me.

I unfortunately can’t see her face from where I’m sitting, but I do have a clear view of her date. Simon seems to be doing a presentation, about what, I’m not sure. All I know is that he has a laptop on the table and is scrolling through an actual slideshow, complete with pie charts and graphs. His dark brown eyes are determined and unblinking, as if he’s making the sales pitch of the century. I wish I had super hearing so I could listen in on his spiel because I’ve never been more curious… or relieved, to be honest. If he thinks he’s going to win Lily’s heart this way, he’s got it all wrong. I’ve skimmed through the romance books she reads, and I’m certain none of them include a grand PowerPoint gesture.

But it looks like Simon wants more than her heart because the next thing I know, he takes a small black box from his briefcase—yes, the guy brought a briefcase on his date—and puts it on the table. He slides it over towards Lily, weaving it in between a plate of Kung Pao Chicken and a dish of fried rice until it comes to a stop beside her porcelain teacup.

My heart pounds as I realize how much I underestimated Mr. PowerPoint. Simon came to win. He’s asking for Lily’s hand in marriage!

A dozen questions fly through my mind, all of which cause beads of sweat to break out along my temple. What kind of guy proposes on the first date? Why isn’t Lily rejecting him? Isshe desperate enough to marry a complete stranger? If so, what can I do about it?

---