Page 33 of An Irresistible Force (Vancouver Vice)

“What is it? I can tell by the expression on your face that you realized something.”

“Have you got X-ray vision or something?”

“I wish,” she said and then blushed again. It was like her skin contradicted what her mouth said. Sometimes, it seemed like there might be a fun person under that chilly exterior. “But seriously, is there something you noticed?”

She already thought I was a sexist pig, so I didn’t want to say it. But knowing Amanda, she wouldn’t leave it alone. “Well, if you really wanted to know something that only a guy would notice,” I muttered. “All the chicks here have great racks.”

I waited for her to tell me off, but to my surprise, her face lit up.

“Bingo! I knew I needed a man’s perspective.”

“Sure, anytime.” I had done good, but I had no clue why.

She picked up her phone. “Darn. 5:30? Is that the time?”

“Why? You usually work late.”

“I have to go. I have a date tonight.”

“You do?” That new chest pain intensified. I’d have to mention it to Dr. Gupta next time I saw him.

She frowned. “No need to sound that surprised. Yes, I’m meeting him for dinner at 6:00. I need to get going.” She began clearing her desk. She put on her suit jacket and turned into a mini-man again.

“Wait. Is that what you’re wearing?”

Amanda nodded. She undid her hair clip and brushed her hair. Her light brown hair looked way better down—more feminine and softer. So, of course she did it back up in the clip.

“Look—it’s not my business, but for a date, you should be wearing something, I dunno—hotter.”

“You’re right!” She pulled open her desk drawer and pretended to search. “Rats. My sexy black cocktail dress is missing. I guess I’ll have to go with the suit.”

“At least take off the suit jacket. You gotta make a little effort.” With lips like hers, she should at least play up her assets. I motioned towards my mouth. “Like maybe some makeup?”

She tilted her head in disgust. “Honestly, Chris, while I appreciate your advice on how to score with my date, you have no clue.”

“What are you talking about? You’re the clueless one. You think that a guy wants a woman who dresses like a man? Guys like their women to look feminine and sweet.”

Amanda pinched her mouth together. Had I gone too far? She was a smart cookie, so how come she didn’t know how crappy she looked? Then she fixed her eyes on mine and released a big breath. “Can you keep a secret?”

This was weird. Was I her new BFF? I nodded.

“Okay, I’ll tell you something—but if you breathe a word to anyone, I will track you down and hurt you. Whenever I come home, my mother thinks it’s a great opportunity to fix me up with any suitable young men who have the misfortune of crossing her path. And my mother is unstoppable.” She pointed to herself. “Which is why I’m here at all.”

A light bulb was starting to come on. “So, you don’t want these guys to like you?”

She nodded. “Exactly. If it were a date that I cared about, I would get dressed up. Maybe not to your standards of femininity, but not my work clothes.”

“But wait, it’s a blind date, right? What if you like the dude?”

“It’s unlikely. Most of these guys are the same: ambitious and image conscious.” She made air quotes. “Dating a ‘Richardson’ legitimizes them in some way.”

“You mean they want money?” I asked. I knew what that was like. Guys from high school were always hitting me up to invest in their businesses or get-rich-quick schemes.

“Well, I have had dates which seemed more like business pitches. But it’s more a status thing. Some guys want old money connections, and that’s all I represent to them. It doesn’t even matter what I’m like.”

“That sounds like the evening from hell. Why do you even bother?” Lately, I’d stopped going out just for the sake of doing something. And besides, the Vice games kept my calendar pretty booked up.

“It’s just easier.” She put her coat on.

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