Page 58 of Second Round

“I’m mature enough to know what’s right orwrong.”

“I know you’re mature, and that’s a very good thing. But adolescents go through a lot of hormonal changes, so that affects their judgment. I’m not saying that you’re not going to make good decisions, only that it’s good to have a back-up system—that’sme.”

“Look who’s talking about hormones,” shemuttered.

“What doesthatmean?”

“You and Dad are theworst.”

Ouch. Her comment hit a nerve because I had been feeling more like a hormonal teenager than myself lately. Empathy won out over anger though. Poor Hannah had to see both her parents going out with new people. Should I offer not to date? But giving her control over my love life wasn’t the right thing to doeither.

There was a long silence. I put my hand on her shoulder, and I could feel the tension. Finally, she mumbled something about “herturn.”

“What’s that,sweetheart?”

“It’s supposed to be me! I’m supposed to be the one going out and instead I have to deal with you guys acting like teenagers.” She burst intotears.

“Oh, honey.” I rubbed her back as she buried her face into a pillow andsobbed.

“It must be hard for you to have to deal with all this,”Isaid.

She nodded with only the back of her head visible. But I was pretty sure that this wasn’t about medating.

“Is there anything elsebotheringyou?”

She raised her head and I pulled her up against me in a fierce hug. She hiccupped. “I’m afreak.”

“You’renot.”

“I am. You don’t know. All my friends at school are so into guys. They’re always talking about which guys are hot. I pretend I like someone, but it’s all fake. I’m a totalphony.”

I squeezed her even tighter. I felt upset and helpless at the same time. “It’s completely natural not to be interested in boys yet. You’re onlytwelve.”

“But so are my friends,” she wailed. “I’m a freak and there’s something wrongwithme.”

“You’renormal.”

“What would you know? You used to be one of the popular girls.” She said that as if it were acrime.

“Again, don’t compare yourself to anyone. You don’t know how they feel in private. Sure, I had fun in high school, but I went through a lot of tough times too. Everyone does. Everyone feelsinsecure.”

Hannah groaned. “Lindsay and Jenna don’t. Their lives areperfect.”

“You don’t know that.” I stroked her hair. “Sweetie, everyone develops at different ages. There will be years and years for you to like guys. Be interested in whateveryouwant.”

We sat there for a long time with the only sound an occasional sniff from Hannah. Then Minx stretched out and fell off the bed, which started both of usgiggling.

Maybe it would be better for her not to hang out so much with Lindsay and Jenna. I’d noticed they’d been dressing and wearing makeup like they were a lot older. But that would be uptoher.

Thanks to Wendybreaking the news, it was time for the kids to meet Leo. The hockey season was over, so his work schedule was more flexible and we could makeplans.

I was a little stressed about it, but Leo calmed me down. “Why don’t we do something activeandfun?”

“Like what? Too bad it’s May and there’s no more skating on GrouseMountain.”

“We could go biking,” hesuggested.

“Sure. Or how about mini-golf? Tristan loves mini-golf. And then we’ll go out for dessertafter.”

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