Page 19 of Hockey 101

Not women’s clothes, for fuck’s sake, Burly curses. We’re hustled off to a back bedroom where someone has acquired every XXL sexy maid costume in St. Viola.

I hesitate and hear O.D.’s voice from the doorway behind me.

Maybe Sinc prefers to go naked, like he did in Humphrey Hall. he sneers. As I feared, the story of my humiliating exit from Jenny’s room is already team legend.

Don’t forget the caps, O.D. snaps as he leaves.

I pick up a frilly white hairband, and the three of us curse in unison. Fuuuuck.

At first, it’s not too bad. Once we’ve squeezed into the costumes, all we have to do is deliver drinks and food to the seniors whenever they call for it. In between, I chat with players I haven’t gotten to know yet. Connor Wahl, our starting goalie, seems like a good guy. Wally is from Manitoba, so we bond over prairie jokes and Canadian football rivalries.

Outside of our stupid maid costumes, it’s like a regular team party. Some guys are playing cards, others are playing drinking games, and a few are out in the backyard, vaping or whatever.

My housemates eventually arrive and have a big laugh at my appearance.

Maybe you could wear that maid getup while you clean our house, Ethan teases.

And maybe you could go fuck yourself, I suggest sweetly.

Bergy peers at me. Don’t take this the wrong way, Sinc, but you would actually make an attractive woman.

Swanny spits out a mouthful of beer, and Ethan groans. Oh man, I’m going to need some brain bleach to forget I ever heard that.

I sit in on a poker game, but O.D. keeps calling me over to serve beer to him and his friends. He’s trying to humble me with his petty demands and insults, but I don’t really give a fuck. However, whenever he deems that I’ve messed up, I have to drink another beer. My alcohol tolerance is pretty high, but it’s not long before I’m feeling a little dizzy.

When I get back to the poker table, my spot’s been taken. Wally motions me over.

Trust me, Sinc, it’s all for the good. I don’t know if anyone’s ever told you this before, but with that face? He motions to me. You should never play poker for money. I can tell every time you get good cards.

I hiccup. Yeah, I’ve heard that before. But I just play for fun.

Losing is not fun, he replies. The perfect goalie philosophy.

Sinc! Beer me, yells O.D. from the living room.

I sigh and get a beer from the kitchen. But when I pass it to him, he claims I took too long.

You drink it. He pushes the bottle at me, but I wave it away.

C’mon, Sinclair. Don’t be such a pussy. Hamm’s is like fucking water, taunts O.D.

I remember Mats’s warning and try to stand up for myself. I think I’ve had enough.

You don’t get to say I when, rook, O.D. snarls.

I ignore him and walk away. Do I have the cojones to leave? I spot Swanny, who gives me a nod. He’ll make sure I get home okay, because I’m not thinking straight right now.

Suddenly, I’m yelping in pain as O.D. grabs me by the hair from behind.

When I say drink, you drink, he hisses in my ear. He yanks my head back and starts pouring beer into my face.

Beer fills my throat and nose and I start to choke and gasp for air. Fuck it, I’ve had enough. This guy is nuts.

Get your fucking hands off me, I yell, which makes him wrench my hair harder. It hurts like hell, so I blindly swing my elbow back and feel something crunch as I connect. The next sound I hear is a thud that shakes the floor. When I turn around, O.D. is lying on the floor, clutching his face.

Fuck, my nose, he moans.

Oh, shit. Sorry. When I get down on the floor to help him, I slip on the wet floor and accidentally knee him in the side.

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