Page 47 of Hockey 101

Who? My throat feels tight. And if she says Mats, I’m giving up.

You know. Her dark eyelashes flutter on her cheeks, and she can’t meet my eyes. Now I’m feeling a lot more hopeful.

I step closer and motion between us. Would it be someone in this general vicinity?

Why are you always making me admit things out loud? she whines.

Because we got off to a shitty start. I don’t want us to have any more misunderstandings.

Andy twirls a loose tendril of her dark hair around her finger and studies the ground. Speaking of not understanding, I…want to ask you something.

What is it?

I’ve observed that there are a lot of women on campus who would give up their brand-new Frye boots for a date with Jack Sinclair.

So? As if I’d want to date any of those women who only see me as a hockey player and not a real person.

Andy stamps her foot on the sidewalk. Ugh, this is so difficult. I’m not fishing for compliments or anything, but I really don’t understand why you want to go out with me. We don’t have a ton in common. You were interested almost from the moment we met, and I…I just don’t get it.

I stare, wide-eyed, but she’s still fixating on the ground. Is she serious? Should I start with how beautiful she is? No, maybe it’s better to talk about how smart she is, and how I feel like I want to be a better person when we’re together.

While I’m flailing around for the perfect answer, she looks up and pins me with her fierce stare. Just tell me one real thing.

I brace myself. This is my moment. All right. You know that first night, when I read your journal?

Andy’s eyes narrow, but she nods.

When Cori broke up with me, I felt like such an asshole. Like I’d been too dumb to realize that she was unhappy, and it was all my fault. It made me second-guess our entire relationship and what kind of boyfriend I’d been. I felt so alone. But when I read that you had been through the same shit, it was huge for me. You wrote that blindsiding someone with a breakup is unbelievably cruel. That while there’s no easy way to break up, being able to make love to someone one night and break up with them a couple of days later is psychotic. Your words, your experiences—they were healing for me.

Andy’s lips part and her dark eyes shimmer even in the low light. I’m so sorry that the same thing happened to you.

You get it better than anyone. I swallow hard, because even now, it’s hard to talk about Cori and our breakup.

Oh, Jack. Andy’s voice is full of sympathy. She puts her warm, gloved hands on my chest, and I cover them with my own and squeeze. Her touch is so soothing. Are you really over your breakup?

I am. Truly. I don’t have feelings for Cori anymore, and I haven’t for a while. Everything that happened at the end still bothered me, though. After all that time together, I feel like she should have given us a chance to talk through our shit. But we can’t control other people, right?

She presses her hands tighter to me. That’s so true. Still, isn’t it common decency to at least have a discussion first? Maybe I should have known, since Bryce has an inherent selfishness that blinds him to other people’s feelings. She winces. Ugh, I really don’t want to be one of those people who complains about her ex all the time.

I smile down at her, already feeling a lot better. You’re definitely not. But I think we’ve both earned one good bitch session where we trash our exes. Like a ritual bonfire.

We laugh together and it’s weird, but I do feel cleansed. Like I’ve shed something heavy. Bringing out the shame that I’ve kept hidden and having Andy empathize is the best. She takes her hands off my chest, but it feels like there’s still a thread connecting us.

I rest my hands on her hips and gaze down at her.

You asked why I’m interested in you. Honestly, there are lots of reasons I like you, but reading what you wrote, seeing your inner strength and your confidence in who you are? That was the second thing that made me think we could be good together. You came out of your breakup stronger, and that’s what I want too.

But there’s only one way to find out if I can be a better boyfriend, and I hope Andy gives me that chance.

She laughs. Okay, I’ll bite. What was the first thing?

How you rescued me that first night, even though you were annoyed the entire time. You have a big heart. I realize I overreacted earlier. Andy wouldn’t shut down the moment I revealed a weakness. She’s too giving.

Once again, you surprise me, Jack. I thought you were going to say you liked my boobs, she teases.

My gaze drops automatically as I remember the feel of her soft breasts in my hands. Oh, I do. As you well know, from our seven minutes in heaven.

Really? More like six minutes of panic and one minute of heaven, she says.