I should be nervous, but I’m really not. Maybe Nico’s fur and his scent comfort me. Maybe Bastien’s song still playing in my mind lulls me. Maybe seeing an enormous monster anxious about my feelings is just too darn delightful to worry over. And Pennie, I still think I want to touch him and see where that goes.
I realize we’re all standing in the middle of the courtyard, while they allow me to take them in, not wanting to hurry my appraisal.
“I like it here,” I gush, smiling in an unselfconscious manner that feels truly strange. But when you know that someone already likes you… well, maybe only then are we free to let down our walls and fully become ourselves.
“You’ve seen me dance, right?” I ask no one in particular.
“Yes,” Pennie purrs, his eyes shimmering at me.
“You’ve seen my hair in the morning… like it probably is now?”
“Yes,” Bastien answers with a grin.
“You know I haven’t yet lived the life I was meant to live?”
“Definitely,” Nico states, pulling me closer to him.
“And you know what I want for my future?”
Archie takes my hand and kisses the back. “We do,” he murmurs in his deep baritone voice.
“Okay then, I’m ready for my tour.”
But we only make it two steps inside the castle when Bastien’s song inside me changes. From celebratory to pained in an instant. I turn abruptly toward him and see the way he’s clinging to Pennie.
“What’s happening?” I demand.
Pennie and Nico share a look and Archie appears uncomfortable. I stare at Bastien who seems ashamed and vulnerable—I hate seeing him like that.
I step toward him, claiming his hand, his soft feathers tickling me. “Tell me.”
“I…” he falters and sends a pleading look at Pennie.
“Bastien,” Pennie says, using his new name for the first time, “requires care that I can provide, but it will mean not being around for about a day, maybe a little more. He’s worried you’ll think that we’re being rude and unwelcoming. But, in truth, it can’t be helped.”
“Care? What kind of care?”
All four of them clam up instantly and I scowl at them. “I’m asking for the truth and I think you’re all worried about freaking me out, and I guess that’s fair. But I’m here and I want to understand what life might be like here. If you can’t tell me the truth, then… do you really believe I belong here?”
“Yes,” Bastien says, “we know you belong here. We know because you can’t stop touching Nico. You can hear my song.I’venever heard my song before you. Until you, I didn’t even believe the myths about a Taran’s song. You are the only one who will ever hear it.” Bastien glances up at Pennie. “And Pennie is glistening more than normal—that’s you too.”
“What about Archie?” I ask, eyeing the mighty monster.
Bastien smirks. “He can break steel, trees, buildings. He can battle a dozen foes at once or craft a treaty, but he’s so flummoxed with you here that he can barely function. He launched his knitting earlier like it was a missile.”
I giggle at the thought of the giant monster knitting. “So proof of my rightness is that I make him anxious?”
Archie holds my gaze. “The proof of your rightness is that I’ve never in my entire life wanted to please anyone more than you. I would do anything for you. But I’ve also never felt like I had more to lose than right now. You’re finally here, but you may not choose to stay when you understand what it means, and if you left because of something I did…”
“Hey,” I say softly, “let’s just take a moment, okay? I’m here and I’m excited to be here. And even just arriving, I already like you all more than anyone I’ve ever dated, so there’s that. But I need the truth because, honestly, I don’t like the idea of Bastien being away from me for a day. I don’t know what that means, what any of this means. The song. His name. I just know that it would be distressing for me to be away from him. So, please, just tell me what this means.”
Nico’s purr reaches my ears first. Approval and care live in that sound and his scent reaches my nose and I lean into him, nuzzling his soft fur with my face.
His voice rumbles through me as he answers, “Bastien needs intimacy, like I told you. His time was nearing and meeting you expedited it. Pennie can give him what he needs. They are being cautious because no one wants you to feel forced into anything you aren’t ready for. If you were to be near them when they are together, it might be challenging not to participate.”
I glance abruptly at all of them, wondering if they heard the thunderclap that just sounded in my lady parts. “Wait… Icouldparticipate if I wanted?”
They all gape at me.