Page 70 of Craving Carla

“I’ve got you, baby,” he murmurs, then buries his face in my neck. When he brushes his nose against the mark where he bit me last night in a moment of passion, something about his touch against it makes me go weak. My arms fall limp at my sides and my head tilts back, completely surrendering myself to him.

“It’s okay, Carla. I understand. I’m not exactly first choice when it comes to the mate department, so I understand your frustration,” he murmurs, then takes his tongue and traces it over my mark. He chuckles against my skin when I shiver.

“This is your claim mark, angel. I’ve already claimed you our first night together. You may not feel the mate bond, but your body understands,” he murmurs.

“Amari,” I breathe out weakly. My body is betraying me, responding to him even as my mind tries to fight it. This is exactly what I feared—the loss of control, the surrender to something I don’t fully understand.

He shifts me, then scoops an arm under my legs, cradling me as he starts to carry me up the porch steps. He turns the knob to the door of my cabin, stepping inside and kicking the door shut behind us. He walks me over to the sofa and gently sits me down. I feel the absence of his touch immediately, my skin cooling where his body had warmed it.

He paces for a moment, unbuttoning his suit jacket, pulling it off, then paces again, unhooking his cuff links. The sight of him moving around my cabin with such confidence, like he belongs here, sends conflicting emotions through me. Part of me wants to order him out, to reclaim my space. Another part watches his movements with fascination, drawn to the predatory grace in every step.

Then he pauses in front of me, and a light smile crosses his face. He kneels in front of me, and I straighten myself up on the sofa, staring at him. I don’t know what to expect anymore. Every time I think I understand Amari, he does something that contradicts my expectations.

I gasp when he gently places his hand on my bare thigh, his cool fingers against my skin making me jump slightly. He smiles at me, but it’s not his usual arrogant smirk. There’s something softer in it, something almost vulnerable.

“Carla,” he says, his tone soft and even, almost as if he’s being careful with me, “did last night not mean anything to you?”

I blink a few times, trying to process what the hell is happening. This isn’t the forceful vampire who just chased me through the forest. This is someone else entirely.

“Yes, Amari. Last night meant everything to me. I meant what I said to you last night.” My voice comes out smaller than I intended, but it’s the truth. Last night was everything—the tenderness, the passion, the feeling of being wanted, truly wanted, for the first time.

Amari smiles at my answer and reaches out, using his hand to pull mine from my lap and take it in his. His touch is cool, gentle, so sweet. I study our hands together—his large and strong, mine smaller but no less capable.

“It really wasn’t a pity fuck? Last night?” I say, looking at him nervously, voicing the fear that’s been haunting me since I woke up alone. He glares at me for a moment, then squeezes my hand.

“A pity fuck? Carla, that is enough.” He snaps at me, golden eyes flashing. He groans, looking away from me for a brief moment, then back to me again.

“I meant everything I said to you last night, Carla,” he says in a stern voice, “every. Fucking. Word. There was no pity on you last night. I made love to you because I wanted you. Because I needed you.”

He looks away from me for a long moment, then sighs heavily, looking back with a patient smile that transforms his face. I’m struck again by how beautiful he is, even when he’s frustrated with me.

“You know, I think this might be a hard lesson for me from Fate,” he says, his voice thoughtful.

“What do you mean?” I ask, curious despite myself.

“I have not been the most honorable when it comes to women,” he admits, and I think of the parade of images Tofi showed us. “Of course Mother Fate would not make it easy for me when the time came. The mate bond is sacred, a bond that will last forever between two souls.”

He takes my hand and pulls it to his lips, gently kissing the back of it. The gesture is so courtly, so at odds with the predator I saw in the forest, that it makes my breath catch.

“So it only seems fitting that I’d have to earn the love and trust of my fated mate and not be allowed to rely solely on the mate bond to do the work for me,” he says against my skin.

I bite my lip, searching his face for any sign of deception. “Does your heart really beat for me?” I ask, the question that’s been burning in me since I felt it against my back.

Amari nods slightly, keeping his eyes on mine. In this moment, he seems incapable of lying, every emotion written plainly on his face.

Tears start to fall before I can stop them. “I don’t understand,” I say, my voice breaking. “I don’t understand any of this.”

“I do,” he says, reaching up to wipe a tear from my cheek. “I know exactly what is happening. You can’t feel the mate bond because your children are a bit overprotective of you. And, Fate’s teaching me a hard lesson.”

I look down at our joined hands, everything suddenly too much. “I’m so tired, Amari. I want to go back into the shadows. Ackley used me for a year, and I was too desperate to feel something to notice. I’ve put my children in danger, I’ve put Wintermoon in danger. The best place for me to be is the shadows.”

Amari gently squeezes my hand, the pressure grounding me. “No, the best place for you to be is with me.” His voice is firm, leaving no room for argument. “You’re not alone anymore, Carla. And while you can’t feel the mate bond right now between us, I’m asking you for a chance. A chance I know I don’t deserve.”

I smile and lean into him, taking my free hand to gently stroke his cheek, feeling his soft beard beneath my fingertips. He closes his eyes and leans into my touch, like he truly wants to be in my company. It’s more than what I could ask for.

“You’re wrong,” I tell him softly. “You deserve so much. But with me being the Mother of Spiders, I’m afraid who I am might hinder you.”

Amari opens his eyes and gives me a wicked grin that makes my stomach flip. “I’ve spent centuries with Kemnebi, and that never hindered me. What makes you think that our children will hold me back?”

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