Page 108 of Penance

I don’t know what to say to that. It’s a fair question.

“I’m sorry,” I tell her.

I don’t know what else to say, but I think maybe part of me—a small part—means it.

Chapter 21

Mercy

The door to his apartment creaks open, and I step into the shadows. I’m not scared, not like I was. Something about the darkness has become comfortable, like a deep hug.

Draco follows after me like a guard. Like he’s protecting me.

That’s all he has done this whole time. He’s been my protector, my rock.

I can’t shake the memory of my parents’ expressions—their disappointment etched into every line in their faces, their eyes dark with judgment.

“How could you let this happen, Mercy?”My mother’s voice echoes in my head, like a knife twisting into my chest.

I’ve always been their good girl, their dutiful daughter.

Now, I’m something else entirely, something they can’t even look at.

The apartment is cool, almost cold. The hum of the city outside is muffled, leaving only the dull thud of my heartbeat in my ears. I hug my arms around myself, trying to chase away the chill.

“I’m sorry, Mercy,” Draco says from the hallway. Turning, I look up at him, and in his eyes I see something that I’m not sure I’ve ever seen before.

Guilt.

“It’s okay,” I tell him. “It’s not your fault.”

“I’m still… just sorry,” he says, shrugging. “I’m gonna go take a shower.”

I nod, and then follow after him, moving towards the bedroom instead. I just want to climb into the bed, wrap myself in his scent and sleep.

Maybe I’ll sleep forever.

Stepping into the bedroom, I sigh, reaching over my shoulder and grabbing the zipper to my dress. I pull it down as far as it will go, and then I let it fall to the floor with a muffled fwump.

I look down at myself, and I swear I can see a swell in my abdomen, right above my public bone.

Is that… my baby?

He had called it ‘our’ baby.

I wish it was.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I wish the baby that was growing in me was Draco’s.

Reaching down, I splay my fingers across it, and press just enough to feel the bump through my skin.

It is.

That’s our baby.

I feel the sting of tears, but I blink them away as I hear the water come on in the bathroom next door.

I can’t cry.

---