Page 65 of Balance

She shakes her head and steps back, wiping under her eyes. “No, he’s done enough. The guy he set me up with has been incredible. We’re going to be filing a motion and just… hoping for the best. He has everything. The police reports, the photos, and even my clothes from that night that the cops finally shipped out to me a few weeks ago.”

I sigh as I lean back against the island and stare up at the bright white ceiling. Shit. “Do you need to go back there?”

She shakes her head and scoffs, “Hell no. I’m never setting foot in Vegas again. I’m happier here… I’m working full time at the restaurant. I love my job. I have enough saved up for a condo closer to the arena…”

I frown and stare into her deep green eyes. “You’re moving out?”

She slowly smiles and nods. “Yes! I found the perfect place. Brand new building, and there’s elevators, a door man, top-notch security. Guards, the works. Nolan actually helped me find it.”

My brows raise and I smirk at her. “Nolan, huh? You’ve been keeping in touch with him?” I turn and finish up breakfast while she giggles.

“Not really, but he’s a nice guy, I guess. He comes into my work but I haven’t gone out with him. We exchanged numbers, that’s all.”

I chuckle under my breath as I begin plating everything and pull the fruit out from the fridge. “He’s handsome…”

She rolls her eyes and helps me fill up some glasses of juice and water before sitting down across from me. “He is. A friend,” she shoots me a look and shovels her eggs into her mouth.

I search her face and frown. A friend… Okay. Her face and body are healed, but heart and mind are not. I wish there was more I could do for her. At least she’s here. Safe.

I can’t believe that the piece of shit was just able to walk out of there. No charges whatsoever. I’m sickened, he could have killed her.

I grumble as I sit down beside her with my own plate and we eat in silence.

At least Avery’s school is only about ten minutes away from the arena, which is where Morgan has been searching for houses to buy for after he retires. I don’t really care where we live. I would be happy with them in a damn cardboard box out in the cold somewhere.

I’ve never been happier in my life.

I’m supported, loved, and cared for like I never have been before. Aside from the piles of bullshit from my past and the shit that Andy keeps sending me, that is.

I haven’t had another meeting with him since the first one a few weeks ago. We went over everything with the Wilders’, but nothing about my biological or adoptive families.

My last email from him a few days ago said that he has some updates and wants to set up a time for him to come over to go through it all. I just hope it’s not more bad news.

I just want to wash my hands of it all. My biological parents are dead. Richard and Lisa are in prison. Francis and Betty are dead. Why do I need to keep digging up my past?

The girls stalk in behind their dad and I send them all a wide smile. We all finish up breakfast and Morgan shoos us all out so that he can clean up. He has today and tomorrow off of practice, it’s strange having him here during the day when he’s been gone so much.

I blow a raspberry with my lips and corral the girls down to the playroom and wave off Mackenzie as she heads to her room to get ready. She said she’s going furniture shopping and to put down the down payment for the condo.

I bite down on my lip as I sit on the floor and paint with Tilly. I comb my fingers through her bright blonde bouncy curls and close my eyes after she sits down on my lap.

I kiss her head and breathe her in, relaxing into the sounds of their laughter and the TV blaring some show that Nessa chose.

I don’t know if I will ever actually, truly want a child of my own, but either way, these three girls have filled my heart with so much love and laughter, that it doesn’t even matter to me anymore if I can have biological children or not.

Mackenzie’s words strike my brain and I sigh. I need to sit Morgan down and tell him the whole truth. About the entirety of my childhood, how I really actually never wanted kids.

Sure, I love them. I want to teach them, nurture them, and save them all if I could. But I have no idea what I would do about raising one. Even if I’m fucking Morgan and falling for him more and more every day, I’m not really the girls’ mother.

I’m still technically their nanny. I cook, clean, and am there for them. I do everything a ‘mother’ would without the title. But when it comes to unconditional love? I have that in spades for them.

I just hope it will be enough.

______________

I buckle up my seat belt and feel like throwing up. Morgan chuckles from his seat beside me and starts to back up out of the garage. We’re taking his Escalade so that his parents will fit with the five of us comfortably. I’m a nervous wreck.

“Tell Lillian about grandma and grandpa, girls.”

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