Page 3 of Fated Surrender

“If she and the baby are fine, then why can’t you sleep?”

Aleks looked over at him and frowned.

“Talk to me, big brother. Maybe I can help.” Connor bumped his shoulder.

“I keep having dreams that I kill my son,” Aleks confessed.

Connor sat back in his chair shocked. Of all the things he thought might be wrong, it certainly wasn’t this.

“Are you concerned about controlling your strength? Like you were when you first met Rebecca?” Connor probed.

“In my dream I mean to kill him. I murder my son.”

“Aleks, you would never, ever kill your son. You are not a murderer,” Connor said firmly.

Aleks shook his head. “When Rebecca was sick with that damn virus, before Doc figured out the cure, he said that there was a way to save Rebecca, if we aborted my son. I thought about it, Connor. I went there, mentally. Before the cure was found, I was prepared to kill my own son.” Aleks buried his face in his hands.

Fuck! How did I miss this for months?

Connor pulled Aleks’s face into his shoulder and held on to his big brother.

“Aleks, you’re dealing with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I thought I had identified most of the cases after the virus was cured. I can’t believe I missed my own brother.” Connor took a deep breath, then continued.

“Aleks, what we all went through, thinking that we would lose the people we love, that was an extremely traumatic event. We were dealing with stress and grief, with little to no, sleep or food. To say that our thought processes would be the same today as what they would have been then, is impossible. It would be like judging the choices made by soldiers in the heat of battle, in times of peace. They cannot be compared.” Connor rubbed Aleks’s back.

“I never even made the connection to PTSD. I have seen guys on the force deal with it. I never thought it would hit me like this. I wonder if the others are doing okay.” Aleks sat up and explained how each of the leaders had been prepared to die with their mates, with the exception of Caleb who would have been left behind.

Oh yeah, I’ll have to check on the others later. Who wouldn’t be fucked up over that?

“I wish you had said something earlier. I hate to think you have been suffering because I wasn’t paying close enough attention.” Connor sat back, disgusted with himself.

Aleks snorted. “It’s not like you were just sitting around, Connor. You were racing around town, talking to everyone months after the virus was cured, making sure everyone was okay. I don’t think I would have opened up earlier than this anyway. I would have been too ashamed to admit what I had been dreaming. The nightmares are what made me realize that maybe I needed some help. Why did you come here anyway?” Aleks asked, eyeing his brother.

Connor pointed to the bag and smiled.

“Ma,” he said simply.

Aleks smiled back and nodded. “I can’t believe I’m a grown man with a baby on the way and she can still read me like a book.” Aleks reached for the bag and brightened when he saw the biscuits and honey.

“I don’t think that will ever change,” Connor said, grabbing a biscuit and coating it in the amber goodness.

“You’re probably right.”

“You good?”

“Talking about it helped more than I thought it would. I thought if anyone found out, they would hate me. But, you’re right, what we were experiencing then, cannot be compared to today. Thanks, Connor. You always know the right thing to say.” Aleks threw a packet of honey at Connor who caught it, smiling.

“That’s my job,” Connor reminded him gently.

Aleks stared at him blankly for a moment and then threw his head back laughing. “I keep forgetting about your degrees. It just seems like you are easy to talk to and everyone feels better after talking to you.” Aleks grabbed another biscuit.

Connor shrugged. “A diner barstool works just as well as a couch in a stuffy office. Besides, we’re shifters. We don’t exactly like admitting weaknesses do we?” Connor asked and raised an eyebrow at Aleks, who looked a little shamefaced.

“I bet you’ve been pulling away from Rebecca, too, leaving her wondering if you still love her. I’m surprised she hasn’t cooked up some half-baked scheme already.” Connor grinned down at his biscuit. His head flew up to his brother as the man stood so suddenly, that his chair tipped over backward.

“Oh God! When I left the house she was on the phone with Rian. I have to get back home before they pull some crazy-ass stunt. Later, Connor, and thanks.” Aleks left the station at a run.

Chuckling to himself, Connor ate the last biscuit and threw the bag away. Feeling proud of his work so far this morning, he tucked his hands into his pockets and headed back toward the diner.

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