Page 31 of Party of Three

“I don’t know…” Buckley’s confidence left him. Jeff Braxton seemed to have that effect. “Do I really have any right to complain? I mean, yeah, so my parents were…eccentric.”

“If by eccentric you mean self-obsessed party animals,” Mateo said quietly.

“Sure, but they didn’t walk out on me like yours did,” Buckley said to Jeff, then to Mateo he added, “And it’s not like they ever rejected me for being gay. I feel like I don’t have any right to complain.”

“’Cause that’s how you felt then,” Mateo said. “Like if you complained or asked them to be parents for a minute or two, they’d lose interest and you’d be all alone. It might have been different if you’d had siblings, but you were on your own with them so you always took care ofthemand tried to be your funny, clever self to keep them entertained.”

He felt more heat rush to his face and a tingling in his palms. And Jeff’s patient nod only intensified the strange blend of self-consciousness that left him suddenly flushed and breathless. It was the same confusion he always felt when Mateo made him feel truly seen and loved. Now it was coming at him from two men, instead of one. He hungered for more, while feeling paralyzed by a fear he might say or do something to cut off the flow forever. So he resorted to his old standby. Deflection.

“So you’re saying I’m entertaining? Even with my clothes on?” Buckley asked with a sheepish grin.

Jeff’s low, commanding voice answered. “If you always put other people ahead of yourself, it can make it hard for someone to walk beside you.”

The truth in the master sergeant’s words, along with the subtle message that he wouldn’t be put off by Buckley’s humor, sent a tremor through him.

He thought about how he went over a year without confessing the depth of his fantasies and desires to his boyfriend, all while making Mateo’s fantasies center stage.

But Jeff had made this observation without rising from his seat and making some excuse to leave the way his parents mighthave in a similar conversation, peppering him with distracted criticisms then leaving him on his own to figure out how to work his way through them.

Even better, when Mateo squeezed his knee, Jeff did the same, causing a matching sensation on the other side of his body. He felt a sudden desire to wilt into both of their arms at once.

“Okay,” Buckley said quickly, “I go next since I just got asked. Mateo’s up.”

Jeff and Mateo cleared their throats, straightening in their seats like little boys trying to broadcast what good students they were.

“Dare,” Mateo said.

Buckley slapped his lap with both hands. “Well, shit! There’s goes my question.”

“Yeah, but later you get to dare him to do whatever you want,” Jeff added.

“Within reason,” Mateo added. “Okay, I get to ask Jeff. Truth or dare?”

“Truth,” Jeff answered.

“Have you ever been in love?”

Jeff hesitated, gazing into Mateo’s eyes. He swallowed. The tension coursing up the sides of his powerfully built neck caused his veins to pop. “Yes,” he finally said.

With you, Buckley thought. And maybe the men on either side of him were thinking it too, and that’s why no one was saying anything. He thought it was a good thing, a beautiful thing, even. A thing that had made this crazy, amazing weekend possible, but it looked like the men on either side of it needed time to process this fact. And suddenly he did too.

Jeff swallowed. “More of a four p.m. tomorrow conversation, know what I mean?”

Which was as good as confirming Buckley’s suspicion.

“Agreed,” Mateo said softly.

The silence that passed over the table was deep and a little dark, and for a second, Buckley thought about cancelling the game. Then he realized he was feeling pressure on both knees, that under the table, both men were caressing him. Possessively. Hungrily. The feel of their combined touch, the sense of the three of them having formed a kind of chain together, felt as absolutely correct as the first time he’d kissed a boy.

“Alright, hit me again, Master Sergeant,” Buckley said. But before Jeff could get a word out, Buckley added, “Dare!”

Jeff threw up his hands and smiled.

“Dare,” Mateo said before Jeff could ask him anything.

“This is starting to feel rigged,” Jeff said.

“Truth or dare?” Mateo asked him with a smile.

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