Page 144 of Share with Me

Chapter Forty-Five

The old curtainsheld together by duct tape fluttered a little when the heater revved to life. Next to it and under an old desk, Ivan stretched out his legs to catch the heat through the socks on his feet.

It was late, pushing three o’clock in the morning. But he had to stay up. The bills weren’t going to pay themselves.

He had spent hours moving dollar amounts on paper to try to pay all the bills. Water, gas, and electricity came right after food. Grandma Yun’s medications and vitamins would be out-of-pocket as his music studio health insurance wasn’t going to cover any of it. Ivan’s own prescriptions would be taken care of by the disability insurance.We hope.

Then there was gas for the truck. He couldn’t ride his bicycle until his left hand had enough strength to grip the handlebar. Until then he had to drive the truck to find work. The truck could take him far in case he found work on Jekyll or somewhere off St. Simon’s Island. He could sell the truck and buy a cheaper car, but who’d want a poorly maintained 1945 Chevy truck?

Ivan went down the list. Tens of thousands of dollars of unpaid credit card debt he couldn’t possibly pay now. Nearly two hundred thousand dollars of house mortgages spread over three loans, one primary and two liens. He wondered how long it would take to pay all that off.

He dared not ask God to rescue him because part of the debt was his own doing. Then again, God could solve this problem.

Lord, fix my finances. Help me get out of debt. Help me never to get into debt again.

This was the first week of February, and almost everything was due or overdue. Ivan stared down at the lists of income and expenses. Without his students, his music studio income had been zero dollars since January. He would have to miss a third house payment or pay partial amounts to all three mortgages. Perhaps he shouldn’t have tried to pay off the liens back in November. It had caused him to skip a house payment.

What in the world had he done?

Now they were in trouble. According to Matt, Georgia law said that three missed payments would trigger the bank’s foreclosure proceedings on Grandma Yun. The house was in her name though Ivan paid all the bills.

How could I do this to her?

Instinctively, his right hand gripped his left wrist as the twisty, seizing pain ripped up his wrist. His thumb pulsated and so did several of his fingers. The swelling had gone down after two weeks of therapy, but the pain inside the wrist was still there.

Ivan feared he had more damage than the doctor and x-rays could tell.

The vent in the old house quieted. Ivan started to feel cold again. In the middle of winter, the only way Ivan knew to keep the heating costs down was to wear more clothes at night. Sweatshirts and sweatpants were not nearly enough. Ivan pulled the old blanket from his high school days, folded it in half, and hung it over his shoulders.

There. He was warm now. Barely.

He wondered if Grandma was as cold as he was. Perhaps she needed more blankets and quilts. He didn’t want to go downstairs to check on her. She was a light sleeper and his walking around looking for blankets in the linen closet in her bedroom would wake her up. He decided that if she was cold, she could get the blanket herself.

He went back to the pieces of paper scattered on his table. He had printed out some sort of chart. His old laptop was whirring on its last legs. He entered those expenses into his accounting software, and found that he was short on everything except his occupational therapy sessions.

Those were somehow taken care of.

Hmmm…

He had assumed it was his disability insurance, but he doubted if it paid for everything. He jotted down a note to himself to call the therapy center to find out who had been footing his bills.

Ivan moved numbers around to no avail. He couldn’t make the house payment if they were to have money for food. Without income sources other than Grandma’s social security checks, they would have to live off credit cards again for the second month. He had already maxed out two of those credit cards. It made no sense at all for him to write checks off one credit card to pay off another. But desperate people didn’t always do common sense things.

I have to find a new job.

Or sell the house.

Or both.

Where would they go if they sold the house? There were a couple of trailer parks they might be able to rent in. Or they could move to Atlanta to live with Ivan’s sister, Willow. Willow might be mad at Ivan, but surely she wouldn’t turn away her own grandma who had raised her. Maybe as Ivan regained his strength he could help teach piano or sub for Willow in her studio.

What kind of other music work could a one-armed violinist do? Ivan wasn’t sure. SISO could use a better music librarian, but that position was also part-time. What Ivan needed was a full-time job, even if at minimum wage. Something that had healthcare for him and Grandma.

Ivan opened up a spiral-bound notebook and began jotting down his job jar for the next day, which would be here in a few hours when the sun rose. First thing he should do was call Matt Garnett. Matt owned two businesses next to each other, one an antique store and the other a thrift shop. Ivan figured he could try to get work there to hold them over for four months until he could play and teach violin again.

Ivan leaned back against the rickety yard sale chair. He rubbed his temples. A headache started from one side of his head and shot to the other side.

“How did we end up this low?”

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