Page 20 of Enraptured

CHRISTOS

SHE’S PUNCTUAL FOR ONCE. Gliding into the room in kitten heels, black velvet pants and a loose cream blouse. I turn away from the mantle to hold out her chair.

“Did you have a pleasant afternoon?” I goad, knowing she spent it pounding against the attic window. I wonder if she’ll try to cut me with the steak knife if I was to tell her the double glass practically makes it soundproof.

She turns hopeful eyes at me. Bloody hell. She thinks there’s still a chance.

“What was today about?”

“Nothing. Charity,” I shrug.

“It didn’t look like nothing. You care about those kids, Christos.”

“It’s a tax write off,” I toss back my whiskey before meeting her gaze. “Using the horses as therapy once a month for the autistic children allows me to label my inheritance as a farm.”

“Liar.”

“You of all people shouldn’t be deluded into thinking I have a beating heart. Are you still hopeful of that, little one?”

“It’s a full moon tonight.” She responds, changing the subject.

“So?”

“I want to go back to the attic. I found a telescope. Contrary to what you might think, I’m not spending my days pining over your black heart or anything else of yours…I’ve been reading. Teaching myself all the things I’ll never learn in a classroom.”

“So, tonight is astronomy, eh?”

“Do you know what happens to a star when it burns out? Their life cycles are fascinating.” She prattles on about theories, planetary alignments, not even stopping to chew her food.

Amused by her, I cut my steak. She hasn’t chatted this much with me…since the day we picnicked on the beach last summer. I nod my head, pretending to listen attentively, but all I can think about is fucking her mouth again. She swallows her food and I remember how she looked swallowing my release.

Theos. My poor dick is raw from the amount of jacking off I’ve been doing. I need her already. I haven’t gone this long without sex while having a woman so near. But I know if I’m to win her back for the long-haul I have planned she needs time to get over Fiona. And time is the ultimate edging. For both of us.

She pushes her plate forward. “Can I go?”

I stand. She hesitates. “I-I was hoping to be alone.”

“Why? You have me intrigued to see these stars of yours.”

I lead her back up to the attic. It’s a goddamn mess. “I-I’ll clean it up,” she offers, afraid I’ll take her night of stargazing away or worse, I’ll punish her with my dick.

“Leave it.”

I step around spilled boxes to the tripod where she already set the telescope in. She stands next to me with an astronomy book in hand. “My mother gave this to me on my fifteenth birthday.”

“I didn’t know. I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be. I never used it. I’m sure she’d be pleased to know I’ll finally use it now.”

She bends, peering into the scope and adjusting the settings. “It’s so beautiful. Do you know what a dark star is Christos? Here come look.”

She steps away, beckoning me to take her place.

“I don’t see anything…”

“Do you see a cloudy ball. It’s murky, dark gray with a few speckles shining.”

I nod, squinting my eye, looking again. “I think I see it.”

“You’re a dark star Christos. I always thought of you that way…ever since that night on board Oasis when you told me this is where we’d end up.”

“And you shine so bright,chrysí mía. Don’t let me burn out completely and die. Orbiting alone. Help me. Be my light.” My voice cracks. I’m never venerable with her but I am now.

“I can’t Christos. I already tried.”

“Try again?”

“This was a bad idea. I’m going to bed. Alone.”

I let her go this time, she walks out slipping through my fingers again. I feel her moving farther away. I sit alone in the attic wondering if I’ll ever outgrow being a lost little boy.