Page 45 of Enraptured

Helena’s been silent, as she listened raptly, hanging on my every word. I arch an eyebrow at her.

“Flush the pills down the loo and tell her you’re still taking them.”

“That’s not a half-bad idea.”

“You were the most ruthless DOM in the world. Bloody brilliant. Don’t fight your nature. Embrace who you are. I think she’s all wrong for you…making you feel torn…feel guilty for the way you were born. What do those Americans always say? Something about not changing yourself for someone? But to be accepted as you are and all that other ra-ra bullshit. You’re a dark man Christos. Perhaps, the darkest. It’s only because she’s forcing you out into the light that you regret who you are. Go back into the dark where you belong.”

I ponder her words. She’s not wrong. But Jessie lets me be both dark and light. She does accept me, all of me and that’s the problem.

“Right. Well, let’s go to bed. I came too much tonight. I need rest.” Alex nudges Helena’s legs so she gets up.

“You’re the smartest man I know Christos. You’ll know what to do.” He places a hand on my shoulder as he and a sleepy Helena leave the room. “Oh, before I forget. Dimitri wanted me to wish you both a Happy Christmas.”

“He can go fuck himself,” I mutter as Alex shuts the door. I sit back down and pour myself another three fingers trying to practice how to bury feelings you don’t want to have.