Page 31 of Roque

CHAPTER NINE

LETTING OUT THE BREATH I’d been holding since we left the party, I shut off the engine and let my head fall against the wheel. It was after two in the morning. Tati was too wired to go home so we went to a twenty-four-hour diner and ordered some food. Although, all I did was push my pancakes around and around my plate.

With heated cheeks, I kept replaying my time in the dark with him.My first kiss.Anger came back in spades. I gave him too much of me as it was over the years. All my hate, all my loathing, most of my thoughts and now I gave him that?

“Fuck!” I lifted my head, slapping the wheel. I’d never get my first kiss back, but I’ll be damned if he’d be the one to get any more of my firsts.

“In my mind’s eye—I pictured that smirking devil with the sea-green eyes. The man who consumed me. I wouldn’t rest until he’s been banished from this earth into the pits of hell itself. If not for what he did to me and my family, just for making me want to feel the things I felt when he touched me.

Zio was still asleep in his chair. I picked up the remote and clicked off the tv. The smell of Roque clung to me. Shaking my head, I entered my bathroom feeling nothing but self-loathing.

How could I let him do this to me again? How does this devil always seem to win?

Undressing quickly, I entered the shower practically scrubbing my skin raw. I needed to get better at this whole male and female thing. I’d been training in the art of espionage and self-defense, but my flaw was not knowing how to protect my female nature from seduction. I wouldn’t let it happen again. I’d need to learn that sex is just sex and not let hormones ever make me weak again.

Turning off the taps, I quickly towel dried and went back to my room to get into bed. It was very late, but sleep was elusive. His brilliant eyes. They’re all I saw.

One time. I’ll allow myself to give in to what happened just this once and then never again.

My fingers crept into the waist band of my panties. My fingers moved faster and faster. I felt his breath in my hair… his low growl of approval as I let him win—let him conquer me.

“Salvatore!” I gasped, coming in waves of disgust and loathing.

I was hunting him, but I was the one trapped by my very own prey. His laser-like eyes somewhat blue, mostly green always haunted me. No matter where I went. No matter how much time passed, I was still stuck in that moment somewhere between life and death. No matter what, it’s always the two of us in the locked together in the dark. Tonight, was no different.

In some sick way, we might belong together. Me, the girl he practically killed just to be re-born.

“Ugh!” I slammed my fist into the mattress wishing it was his smug face. Disgusted at how much he wins even though he doesn’t know I’ve started playing our game, I bounded out of bed and washed my hands. Steeling, myself, I raised my head and met my own eyes in the mirror. “War. I must become Diana the goddess of war. Romina is the girl he hurt. Diana is the woman who will bring him to his knees…”

With resolve, I turned on my desk lamp and opened my laptop. Since sleep wouldn’t come anyway, I might as well start preparing for battle.

***

“Again.”

Sweat poured from my brow, threatened to blind me. My muscles screamed to stop. But I raised my fists and jabbed again. My trainer, Carlos was ready and blocked the shot.

Spinning fast, my left leg lifted giving a swift kick at his ankles. He jumped over them and answered with a quick punch to my side.

“Fuck!” I faltered back and he took the opportunity to plow me over, pinning me to the mat. But I squirmed like a snake, lifted my hips and let him feel the softness of my core.

“Diana. Stop.”

Carlos was a professional and since that night in the closet last ten days ago, I’ve been trying to practice my wiles on him. He was only in his mid-twenties though and a ripe young thing like me must feel good to him on some level. Instead of stopping, I wrapped my hands around his neck and let my tongue taste the sweat on his light latte colored skin.

He flinched, vaulted off me and grabbed a towel. “Enough. If you keep this up, I can’t train you.” He picked up his water bottle, slammed through the backdoor and let it shake behind him.

“Well shit.” Pushing myself up, I reached for my own towel. Carlos was the best. If he dumped me, I’ll never get better. Pulling my hoodie on, I followed him but gingerly opened the door to the alley.

“I’m sorry.”

He spun fast turning to face me. “What the hell is up with you girl?”

I swallowed hard. “A guy.”

He snorted. “No shit. But I ain’t him. You can’t touch me like that. For one it’s illegal and I ain’t gonna do time again. I chose a different life, you feel me?”

I nodded. “Sorry.”