Looking out at the waves and smelling the tang of salt, for a moment I wished we could just go back. When was the last time I was genuinely happy? I know it was here. It was summer and maybe July? That’s it—July 4thweekend. Charlie and I must’ve been about eight. Dad had just bought a smaller power boat and was teaching me all about it. We watched the fireworks from offshore. Mom and Dad were happy. They even kissed. Charlie and I got sick from eating too many gummy bears and drinking Dr. Pepper.
“Chase?” Charlie touched my arm. Her eyes were soft—hesitant.
“I miss it here. Before Mom and Dad’s marriage turned sour. Remember the summer we snuck out to go to Grant’s bonfire party?”
“You bet,” she laughs, “You caught me kissing Mike Reynolds by the dunes and went ballistic.”
“You were fourteen!”
“So. He wasn’t my first kiss. I bet you beat me by a year on that.”
“Actually, I was eleven.”
“Slut!” She smacks my bicep. “Who was she?”
“Your best friend, Emily.”
“She never told me!”
“Why do you think she kept asking you for sleepovers? To watch Vampire Diaries?” Her wheels turned, thinking back to summers from long ago… the ones that slip through your fingers leaving you desperately wanting the magic back.
“That sneaky bitch!”
I grinned. “What can I say? I always was irresistible.”
“Hey, Mr. Irresistible. We’re losing good light. Storm clouds are rolling in.” Carlos checked his equipment while keeping one eye on the sky. I moved outside the beach tent serving as my changing room. “This is the last favor I’m doing for you for a while, Char…”
Rip.
I winced. This wasn’t good. When I walked the seam tore up to my crotch. “Um, sis? We have a problem.”
Carlos’ eyes almost popped out of his head.
Charlie’s face turned red. “I didn’t need to see all that…”
She blindly picked another bathing suit off the rack and threw it at me. Cupping my package, I waddled back into the tent afraid the back seam would also split. In a flash I took off the ripped suit and pulled on the new one. It was tight, but not cut-the-circulation-to-your-junk tight.
“Forget Mr. Irresistible. You’re going to be Mr. July,” Carlos started snapping away. Only then did I look down feeling like a clown. I was wearing dark blue spandex shorts with stars n’ stripes on it. Just great. I’d never wear anything so cheesy or tight.
“Only men in body building competitions wear shit like this!”
“Wait! He still has his shirt on!”
My hands lifted to my tank. Instead of taking it off, I tore it down the middle.
Click. Click. Click.
“Fuck this.”My eyes said. But my body… it said come look at me and save some friggin’ dolphins.
“And that’s a wrap.”
As soon as Carlos lowered his lens, my scowl reappeared. I rushed into the tent to get dressed.
“Well, that’s it then.”
“Hmmm…” I was preoccupied with the work emails that held my attention as well as the dozen texts from the girl I met on my Tonight dating app. Her name was Darla and she said she was a dancer. I deleted her texts, ready to reply to some emails instead as images of Darla wearing pointer shoes doing splits filled my head.You will not be like Dad.I chanted over and over internally.
“I’m flying back to New York tomorrow morning. It was good seeing you.”