Page 72 of Hate Wrecked

“I didn’t do it for myself. I hoped you would find your way to her again.”

“I hope I can,” she admits. “You want to hear something crazy?”

I nod.

“It scares me sometimes how much I like it here,” Riley says.

“Me too. I’ve always wanted the quiet.”’

“I want that. But I’ll always have a public life,” Riley whispers.

“I know.”

“You can’t disappear when we get back. Who’s going to protect us?”

I laugh, low, bringing a small smile to her face. “There’s always going to be someone,” I say, turning to her.

“No one is you.” I don’t stop her when she sits up, moves over me. I grip her hips as she looks down at me, her dark hair cascading.

“Do you want me to be your bodyguard?” I ask. “Because that’s a little...”

“No. I want you to be mine.”

I close my eyes, and she continues.

“I want you to follow your dreams. I want to read the stories inside of you, Rowan. Your voice is love, strength, everything. And when we leave, you’re going to tell this story.” She grabs my hand, bringing it to her heart. “How we knew we would be rescued. How we survived. Second chances only happen once. This is it. You’re it for me.”

And just like that, the spell is broken. I sit up, pushing her off of me. “Don’t make any rash decisions about your life while we’re here. You’re a million different versions of yourself on this island. I want to see who you’ll be on solid ground.”

She reaches for me again, but I pull away.

Her jaw is set when she speaks again. “This isn’t a rash decision. It’s the one I made with my heart the moment I saw you at that airport. I knew I couldn’t let you out of my sight again. It’s why I couldn’t get on that plane. I felt a heavy ache in my gut when I thought about leaving you. Don’t make me leave you. I’ll never repeat a mistake like that if I have the choice.”

I stand, regret in my chest, longing in my body now that we’re not touching. “You should have gotten on that plane, Riley. You wouldn’t be here, stuck with me, if you’d listened. You didn’t respect my wishes. Again. Just like back then.”

“I had wishes back then, too,” she whispers.

“To use me? You go that wish.”

“To go slow!” she yells, standing. The same line, the same fight. I don’t know why I even said anything.

“We did go slow,” I say through gritted teeth. And we did, in physical ways—not in our hearts. Which is why I couldn’t be her dirty little secret. So I protected her, and she protected her reputation. Playing make-believe out here won’t change the past. I hate this feeling between us: animosity and arousal. I groan, gripping my skull as I walk to the shore. “Why can’t you just leave the past there. You’re fucking with my head.”

She follows, at my heels when she speaks. “I’m not that girl anymore. I’m not a woundedgirltrying to outrun her past. You want me to forgive my mother, but what about you?”

“I’m not mad at your mother.”

“No, you’re mad at me. Where is your forgiveness for me? Or is it only you who gets to choose who receives it?”

“Grow up,” I mutter, reaching the shore.

“Oh, how original. You’ve got a bag full ofgrow ups on hand. Fuck, you,” Riley says, walking past me, forcing me to look her in the eye. The firelight casts her in amber, in orange, in anger. “I know this is scary, and it’s…endless. This feeling inside? It’s useless. You can be mad at me forever. You can be mad at this happening. But I’m taking this second chance.”

I stare at her. “Does this look like a second chance? We’re alone on an island. Someone should have shown up by now. They haven’t. No one knows where we are. Hell, they probably think I kidnapped you. This isn’t a second chance. This is a death sentence.”

She smiles, shaking her head. “Someone is coming. I can feel it. We just…we have to be strong. You can’t be this way.”

“What way?” I ask.

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