Page 20 of Seven is Swell

“You want to leave that to chance?” she asks in disbelief.

"I seem to be pretty good at running into you. I think I like my chances. Besides, if it keeps happening, you might get to thinking the goddess wanted us to run into each other. And then you won’t be able to argue with how frequently I creep into your thoughts.”

She cracks a smile. “You've got it all thought out, then.”

“Delaney, you good?” a deep voice asks through the door which does not belong to Adler. One of her mates, then.

“Yeah!” she yells back. She wiggles her hips, so I let her down, leaning in one more time to kiss her nice and soft.

“Something to remember me by,” I say and then I twist the doorknob and pull it open just enough to squeeze through. I offer a goodbye to the collection of people growing in the hall and start walking across campus at a much more relaxed pace than before, wanting to be careful so I don’t squander the gift of a healed ankle she just gave me. It feels almost stronger than it did before, but I’m sure it’s just because I’m more aware of how it felt a moment ago.

I wait until I'm outside of the building before I pull out my phone, knowing this conversation is going to suck for several reasons, but there’s nothing I can do about it now. Decisions are already made.

“Where the fuck are you? I told you to be here on time, which means you should have been here early. I don’t have a fucking moment to spare.”

“And I meant to be early,” I explain as I start to pick up my pace just a little. “I had a little run in with your fiancée and I physically had to stay for a bit,” I tell him.

“That wasn’t part of the deal. And back off of her—she’s mine.”

“I’ll be there in a minute.”

“What were you doing with her?” He sounds nervous.

“Iliterallyran into her. Knocked her over, had to take care of her, and then she took care of me because I got hurt, too.”

“How nauseatingly sweet. Don’t let it fucking happen again. Now get here so we can figure this shit out. You’re running out of time. Things are getting set in motion and you need to be ready.”

“I don’t need to hear again about what happens if I’m not ready. Sorry, sir, I’m on my way.”

I try and breathe normal, making my lungs inflate and deflate evenly. I need the oxygen to stay levelheaded so I can fight my way out of this mess I find myself in.

Chapter Six

The Tale of the Mashed Potatoes (part two)

The thing is, do-gooders can't succeed in a place like Hell.

No, really, it's in our bylaws.

I'm not sure where they even learned about cupcakes and sprinkles, but they did, and they brought in so many to try and tempt us with.

Do you have any idea how terrifying a pink sparkly cupcake is when you're used to the food served in Hell?

I'm not saying they made me scream and pee a little in terror, but I'm notnotsaying that either.

Somebody got sent down here that wasn't supposed to.

No doubt it was someone's idea of a practical joke, to send a second-grade teacher that enjoyed baking in their spare time to Hell, because she caused so much chaos that her arrival is literally a national holiday now.

So, this disgustingly well-meaning person got sent to Hell, which now that I think about it must have been incredibly inconvenient for them, too, and after a few measly days of being screamed at by their personal evil overlord, she started trying to recruit for her cause.

The whole thing was odd. I recognized some of my fellow demons in the mob, but they were laughing. They thought they were being hilarious, trying to fight for pay for all our hard work and “fair” working conditions.

Lucie (that's short for Lucifer, in case you were wondering) snapped his fingers when he got bored of it all and vaporized the lot of them, which, really, what else were they expecting? To be sent to Heaven and given a pat on the back and a puppy? No, we torture souls down here. Occasionally completely eradicate their existence, but that’s nearly always well-deserved.

Nearly…

So that whole angry mob hullabaloo meant I had to go several days without my overlord. It was dreadful. And I don’t mean that in the good way, either.

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