Page 13 of Tamed Wolf

The shower only gets lukewarm, but that’s fine. Maybe the pain of carrying a baby and having to stoop over and run on such little sleep will be the reason I'm able to cling to my sanity for the rest of the afternoon. If that doesn’t do the trick, I’m sure there are plenty of other opportunities around the property for me to find success in.

Chapter Six

Lark, After

“They’re here.”

“That’s not funny.”

I look down at my six-week-old and drink up the little bit of contentment while I can. Tomorrow I get put back on rotation for the shelter, so this is our last lie-in before I have to baby wear him while I work the never-ending pile of laundry that the shelter processes.

The director of the shelter steps into my room, a tear dripping out of her eye. She makes eye contact with me, and the expression on her face stills my breath.

“You’re…serious?”

She nods, wiping a tear off her face.

“But—"

“You know if there was anything I could do about it, I would in a heartbeat. It kills me to be the caretaker of all you girls without any power to actually protect you from the rest of the world. As of now, pack law states that babies belong to the fathers in a case of separation. It’s patriarchal bullshit, but until we get some worthwhile alphas running things, it’s not likely to change.”

I clutch Camden to me, gently of course, already trying to prepare myself for how bad this is going to hurt. “I haven’t heard from them since they brought me here. I didn’t believe they’d actually do this. To reject me is an act vile enough, but to come with the intention of taking my baby away from me?” I shake my head.

“Do you want me to let them in, or would you rather meet them out in the visiting room?”

“Can you… maybe hold him while I get dressed?”

“Of course, Lark. It would be my pleasure. Let me just wash my hands first.”

She steps up to my rust-stained sink that I’ve scrubbed tirelessly to no effect and soaps up her hands, drying them off before reaching for Camden.

“Don’t— that is, would you mind just staying in the room? I want to be able to see him if he’s about to…well…”

“I’ll just turn towards the door and sing to him. Take your time. I say make ‘em wait. We might have to comply but don’t have to do it joyfully or succinctly.”

I nod my thanks as tears start running down my face, and I grab the one of three outfits I have; used sweats somebody left behind and a t shirt that was donated from some painting company, a hoodie that’s entirely too big but comfy, and the shoes that have been passed through at least three other residents before they were given to me.

I have no shame in what I’m wearing, because I’m clothed, and I didn’t choose this. I’ve been going to counselling and I’m a little stronger now, but I’m still only 18 and it’s difficult for me to be too mature about any of this when I just want to scream to the world about the injustices being done and demand somebody do something about it.

When I feel about as ready as I’m going to get, I throw my unwashed hair up into a bun and take the baby, making sure his diaper is clean and he’s nice and swaddled with a cap on his tiny head before bringing him outside of the room.

“I don’t even know what to say to them. Now that I’ve been here about as long as I was with them, living with them and being a part a pack feels like it might have happened to somebody else.”

“I don’t want to sound like I’m trying to downplay anything you’ve gone through, because I’ve been here to witness every step of your grief and I’ll be here every step you continue to take towards healing. I'm still going to be here when they leave though, and you're strong as hell. I'm going to help you work through whatever they decide to put you through today, and remember you have something vital that they can't take away from you. Spirit. It may feel broken, it may be polluted or feel useless to you right now, but it's going to emerge when you really need it to, and they can't touch that.

“Just breathe in that baby you made all by yourself, feel his weight in your arms, and revel in the fact that your incredible body created him from just a tiny deposit made by those idiots that don't know the difference between a diamond and a sack of trash.”

Chapter Seven

Ivan, After

“This place smells like gravy.”

I nod at Trevor and stay as still as I can, not wanting to lose count in my head.

“What the fuck is taking her so long? This place can’t be that big. You’d think she might be a little excited to see us. It’s been what, eight or nine months? How long are shifter pregnancies? She probably had the kid, right?”

“You’re fucking stupid. I sent you that app to track the baby’s growth the week after we brought her here. You haven’t been reading at all, have you? You been lying about it all this time?”