Page 80 of Now or Never

Max stared at her, his face softening slightly, as if he was worried. Then he hid his feelings, gave a curt nod, and casually stretched out his legs, crossing his ankles over each other under the opposite seats.

“How was breakfast?” Chelsea asked the rest of the group, voice softer.

Amy piped up with a full recap of the menu, and Adam wanted to hug her. The rest of the ride back to Mapleton was pleasant, with everyone chatting and avoiding bringing up anything even close to Chelsea’s hand in Adam’s lap.

But Adam barely spoke a word, and everyone clearly noticed his voice was absent. He normally couldn’t shut up in social situations, but he was way too deep in his head to even follow the conversation. He just kept wondering why he was doing this and feeling like a selfish prick.

By the time they had dropped everyone off, and Chelsea and Adam were the last ones on the bus together, he’d realized that whenever he was alone with Chelsea, his brain just shut down. Being with her felt so good that he didn’t consider her future. She deserved to have what she wanted, not to be hung up with some guy who would never, ever commit.

“You okay?” Chelsea asked after the doors closed behind Ethan and Natalie and the bus started toward Monroe Manor.

Adam squeezed his eyes shut. What a fucking mess he’d made. “I’m not sure.” God, that was so fucking douchey. Maybe she’d tell him to go fuck himself, and the balance in the universe would be restored.

Unfortunately, she did the opposite.

She slid in closer to him and rested her temple on his shoulder. “Don’t listen to them. Who cares what Max and Natalie think?”

When he didn’t respond, she sat up and turned toward him, kissing his cheek, then looking at him with those eyes. God, he loved those eyes.

“Do you want to hang out for a while?” she asked with a smile. “Maybe we can watch a movie?”

He wanted to scream yes. There was nothing he wanted more than to spend more time with her. But he couldn’t even force himself to nod. He just stared back at her, completely lost between wanting to love her and wanting to run before he hurt her.

The bus made a right, pulling into the Monroe driveway, and Adam’s stomach dropped.

What the hell was he going to do?

“It’s just a movie, Adam,” she laughed. “It’s not like I’m asking you to move in with me.”

He nodded without thinking. Just stared at her eyes and nodded.

She smiled, and he got her dimples as the bus came to a stop. “Come on.”

He stood and followed her off the bus, but as soon as he set foot on the gravel, her front door swung open and Ben came flying down the stairs toward Chelsea.

“Benny!” she yelled, dropping to a squat and opening her arms. “Oh, I missed you!”

“Mama!”

He smashed his cheek into hers, his little hands spread out on her back.

Adam couldn’t look away. He was frozen in place.

Chelsea pulled back, then looked at his hand. “What’s this?” she asked.

“An invitation,” Ben said. He turned to Adam and walked over. “This is for you.”

Adam took the outstretched blue envelope from Ben, then turned it around. On the front, in thick blue marker, was the wordAbam.

He looked back up at Ben, who was smiling back. “I’m having a Spider-Man birthday party. Aunt Jae said I put the stick on the wrong side of the circle.”

Adam stared down at thebin his name, then back at Ben, then back at theb. If he thought he was lost before, that was nothing. Now he was lost without a compass or directions, out of gas, the sun was setting, and a pack of hungry wolves was after him.

What the hell was he doing here? Why was he inserting himself into their lives? How could he do to Ben what had happened to him?

He couldn’t.

He had to end this now.

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