“If you don’t want to be friends or don’t want to be seen with me, just say that.”
“How do you do that?”
“Dowhat?”
“Just say whatever’s on your mind.”
I scoff. “Nice deflect.”
He stands slowly, rubbing the back of his neck, his eyes filled with an emotion I can’t quite decipher. Guilt, maybe? Regret? “I want to be friends with you…” Then he adds, his voice so low, I barely hear him. “I think.”
“Youthink?” I turn at the sound of Roman’s truck pulling up, then face Liam again. “Maybe you should think on it some more and let me know when you’ve decided.” I take a step back, away from the cause of my heartache. “Save us both from this ridiculous back and forth.”
17
Addie
If life was a scavenger hunt and Liam Preston was one of the never-ending puzzle pieces, I’d throw him away.
Not because I think he’s useless or because I want to hurt him, but because I hate the way he’s made me feel. With a single, insignificant act, he has me questioning who I am, and worse? What I’m worth.
The last time I cared what anyone thought about me wasbefore.Before my parents left, and the hunger kicked in, and the need for food was so desperate I tried to pry open cans with my bare teeth.
Before Roman took my hand in his, told me I would be okay, and assured me that everyone else would see me that way. It stopped then and there. Like a switch. Even when I moved to a new school, four hours away, and the whispers I was a foster kid began, I didn’t care. So, I don’t know why I suddenly care now. Especially about what a guy thinks of me. One guy, to be specific, but?—
My phone alerts me to a text, and I drop the pen into my journal and slam it shut. The first thing I notice when I find my phone tangled in the bedsheets—somewhat like my current state—is the time. It’s close to midnight, and the only texts I get at this hour are from the team’s group chat, most of them talking about how great their summer is going. It’s not the group chat, though.
Unknown:
I don’t know how to have friends.
Another text comes through as I’m reading the first.
Unknown
It’s been a while…
Heart suddenly racing, I sit up, eyes narrowed at the screen as I watch the three dots appear, indicating he has more to say.
Unknown
It’s Liam, by the way.
I save the number underLiamand type back:
Addie
How did you get my number?
Liam
Your employee file on my dad’s computer.
Liam
Sorry.
I picture him in his bed, the room dark, the light from his phone casting shadows on his features as he takes his time,questioning every word he’s about to type. It’s easy to imagine, because I’m currently experiencing it too.