Page 86 of Liam

I shook my head. “I don’t know.” Then I went into the darkness of the closet and fell into its depths.

The first time I’d done it was the day I found out my mom had died. I didn’t know what to do with the overwhelming emotions, but I knew I needed to be alone—in the silence of grief. In the stillness of my surroundings. It was the only thing that seemed to calm me.

It’sstillthe only thing that calms me.

Lincoln was the only person to see me in the days after the beating. He made sure of it. Because even though I knew, deep down, that my brothers loved and cared about me, that they would burn down the world for me… shame?—

Shame broke me down into tiny pieces.

Tore my existence to shreds.

And created irrational thoughts, void of the consequences that come with them…

I wanted to die.

And in a way, I think a part of me did.

31

Addie

I didn’t even step foot in the cabin. Instead, Isprintedhome, pulled out all my journals still packed in my suitcase, and went through every page, one by one. I tried to find the missing pieces. And with each page flip, each scattered word my eyes took in, my heart fractured inside my chest until there was nothing left to break.

I didn’t find a single clue. Not a single fragmented memory that leads to what happened to Liam. And so I picked up my phone and went in search of answers.

Addie

Do you know where the golf course is?

Roman

The one where Wyatt works?

Addie

Yeh.

Roman

Yes. Why?

Addie

Can you take me there when you finish work?

Roman

Sure. You meeting Wyatt, or you want to play a few holes?

Addie

A bit of both.

Hours later, Roman texts to say he’s on his way. I head straight to the parking lot to wait for him, stewing on every single emotion as they tear apart my insides.

Sure, I could’ve called Wyatt to ask him about it, but this is a conversation that needs to happen in person. And, if my suspicions are right, the wrath of his actions is something that should befelt. Not heard.

Roman can tell something’s wrong the moment I get in his truck, but he doesn’t need to know the extent of my anger. My fury.