Page 19 of Fan Favorite

“Well, this took a turn.” Jessa gave Peter a look—he was pressing her too hard. “Why don’t you take it down a notch, Nietzsche?”

Peter ignored her. Against his better judgment, he had to admit there was something about Edie Pepper that felt exciting and new. He leaned in, typing and dictating. “Edie Pepper, age thirty-five, appears relatively intelligent, but somehow stillbelieves in fairy tales…” Peter looked up from the laptop and met Edie’s gaze. “You know you can get married and still die alone tomorrow. The idea that you have some sort of control over it—over ensuring some perfect person, some soulmate, is going to be there for you in a thoughtful way every time you need them—is ludicrous. It doesn’t happen. People are fundamentally selfish.”

“Then why do you make this show, if you don’t believe in love?” Edie demanded.

“Because they pay me a fuck-ton of money to do it.” Peter crossed his arms over his chest and assessed her again. “So, what are you really doing here, Edie Pepper? You told me yourself that you’re not aKeykind of girl.”

Edie’s face was almost as red as her sweatshirt. “I’m here because I believe in love!” She stood up and swept her arms around in exasperation. “Really, I couldn’t care less about your stupid show, and actually, I’d prefer not to be in a hot tub on national television because that shit is embarrassing and”—she searched for the word—“antifeminist! Maybe coming here was a mistake, but from the moment I saw Charlie again, I just wanted to talk to him and tell him I never forgot him and that, I don’t know, I still have so much love for him in my heart. But clearly I’m an idiot. Lauren warned me you’d be full of shit, and here you are, full of shit.”

Peter threw his pen on the table, victorious. “Now we’re getting somewhere!”

“What?” Edie exclaimed.

“Now that we know you’re here for the right reasons, we can talk details.” Peter patted her chair. “Sit down.”

“You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Sadly, he’s not. This is just how he is,” Jessa explained. “But luckily I’ll be your producer and you’ll be working with me most of the time.”

“Not entirely true, but sure,” Peter said.

“Is this how you do things around here?” Edie asked, slowly sitting back down. “You just mess with me until I get mad and say things I’ll regret later?”

“Pretty much,” Peter responded.

“He’s kidding.” Jessa smacked him on the arm again. “Look, Edie, Peter’s just cranky. That’s his whole personality: cranky. And suspicious. And judgmental.”

“I’m waiting for the part where you say, ‘and that’s what makes him such a great boss and friend,’” Peter interjected. “I am your boss, you know.”

“But he’s not wrong to push you here,” Jessa continued. “After the whole Wyatt Cash thing, we have to be extra cautious. We can’t have our show tanked by another person using us for fame, you know?”

“But I would never do that,” Edie said. “I don’t even want to be famous. I don’t brush my hair enough to be famous.”

“Obviously, I know that,” Jessa said, patting Edie’s knee. “But our friend Peter here—he’s harder to convince.”

“Bottom line: If you join the show, it can’t be a stunt,” Peter said firmly.

“Now I feel worried that none of this is real,” Edie said. “I mean, I know it’s not real. But some of it is real, right? Or is it not real at all? When Britton and Murphy got engaged last season, was that real? Or not real?”

“I promise you,” Jessa said, hand to heart, “we want to be your friends and help you get everything you want. We believe in your love story.”

Edie Pepper did not look convinced.

“Here’s the deal.” Peter shut his laptop with a snap and leaned forward to look Edie in the eye. “The Keyis a microcosm that parallels dating in the real world. You encounter all sorts of crazy people in the real world, right? Guys who have to… meditate after sex and so on. And you have to figure out whattheir intentions are, what they want, what you want, et cetera.The Keyis the same—there are just cameras along for the ride. Bennett’s got to figure out who he can trust and what he wants and what’sreal. That’s why millions of people tune in every week—for the tension between what’s real and what’s not.”

“What Peter means is,” Jessa took over, “it’s as real as you make it. Sure, we’ve got some gals who will never end up with Bennett, who are just hanging around for some screen time. We all get that. It’s a symbiotic relationship—we let them be on our show, and they do things normal people would never do, providing meme-able drama for our audience. But that’s just one side of the show. The other is Bennett Charles passionately looking for the woman that will shape the rest of his life. And we think that could be you.”

“Does Charlie even want me here?” Edie exclaimed, like all the bad possible outcomes of joiningThe Keyhad just occurred to her. “Have you even asked him?”

“You’d let that stop you?” Peter asked. “Jessa, call the network. I have an idea for a spinoff—it’s calledAlone Forever.”

“You’re hilarious,” Edie said dryly.

“Look, we didn’t ask him, and we’re not going to,” Peter replied. “I don’t want to put too fine a point on this, but what Wyatt did was lie to millions of people. He went on TV and told the world he was going to find his wife onThe Keyand then, whoops, turns out he wasn’t looking for a wife at all. He made everything look fake. Even the stuff that’s not. He quite literally shook America’s belief in a fairy-tale love story. Our job is to regain America’s trust. Make them believe in love again. Rebuild their faith in this process. And the only storylines I’m interested in are the ones that are about true love. And the only way I see this season ending is with a fairy-tale engagement. So, what I’m asking is, do you see yourself on that mountain? And how hard will you fight to get there?”

Edie just stared at him, her mouth opening and closing slowly.

Jessa got up and held Edie by the shoulders. “I wouldn’t have brought you here if I didn’t think this could work. We just had to make sure you were for real.”